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Broker shows the futures sound of Cantopop

Brokerage firm Cresvale Hong Kong is about to lose its rising star. Calvin Ng is set to abandon the glamorous world of settlements in favour of the Cantopop stage.

The Cresvale paper pusher was netted in TVB Jade's annual talent trawl on Sunday night.

Young Calvin sang and danced his way to victory in the International Chinese New Talent Singing Championship.

On Monday, the Cantopopper spent some of his prize money treating colleagues to a celebratory lunch.

Soon he'll be jetting off to the mainland for the contest's Shanghai segment.

No word on how many of Sunday night's competitors were members of the soon-to-be-merged stock and futures exchanges. But Lai See is willing to bet there were quite a few.

These days, there's a lot of song and dance going on with regard to the controversial union.

Today's quiz: Which of the following is NOT a tax write-off for Kiwi prostitutes? A) Bubble bath B) dairy whip C) condoms D) oils E) tissues F) black stockings G) lingerie H) see-through garments The answer is F.

And yes, soliciting is illegal in New Zealand.

But strict tax secrecy laws allow sex workers to stay in the revenue department's good books without running the risk of being charged.

A recent parliamentary inquiry into the tax inspectorate uncovered a list of acceptable claims for expenses that prostitutes can set off against income tax.

The discovery was documented in an accountants' trade magazine.

That's how we learned that plain stockings can't be written off - but patterned ones can. Apparently the plain ones are considered too respectable.

We're guessing it works the other way round for bank robbers.

Shrewd tax types would realise immediately that a patterned stocking-over-the-head could obscure the robber's view of his victims.

So if you happen to knock over Kiwi banks for a living, don't try and write off your wife's sequinned fish nets.

The tax boys might think you're dishonest.

We're a bit taken aback by some of the family entertainment the Hong Kong Tourist Association is serving up this month.

Their press release tells us to be prepared for 'Hot Summer Happenings' at the Tsim Sha Tsui waterfront.

Admission is free and the music shows are said to provide 'suitable entertainment for all the family'.

Among the list of local bands gracing this free-for-all, bring-the-kids event: 'Muff Divers'.

Want to know what the Get-a-Life club got up to yesterday? They went on a field trip.

To a parked bus.

Yes, KMB yesterday offered Hong Kong dullards a once-in-a-lifetime chance to spend two hours sitting in their new 'Centroliner', free of charge.

Passengers were invited to come and hang out with the new vehicle in the Tin Yiu terminus.

From the moment they clap eyes on the Centroliner, visitors are struck by the similarity between this bus and every other bus.

'Passengers can sit back and take this opportunity to freely express their opinions on bus services in Tin Shui Wai to KMB staff', a press release tells us.

We're told it's got a 'low front-axle unit with independent suspension', a 'super-low floor with rails made of non-slip material' and an 'electronic periscope'.

How thrilling.

Next week, club members will go on a picture-taking outing to try and capture on film the exact moment when paint dries.

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