Unwanted leaders

PUBLISHED : Saturday, 07 February, 2004, 12:00am
UPDATED : Saturday, 07 February, 2004, 12:00am

So now the US and British spin doctors are putting out the line that that even though there appears to be no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, the invasion was a good thing as 'we're better off without Saddam'.

I must agree with that and it sets a fantastic precedent doesn't it? All the sexing up, lies, half-truths, groundless assumptions and exaggerations are beginning to make sense. They are part of a cunning plan Edmond Blackadder would have been proud of. Now, when a country has a leader we are better off without, we can invade it and restructure him or her.

So we need a shopping list of countries whose leaders we do not like. Wait - who is 'we?' Cannot be me, because no one took any notice of people who protested that Iraq did not have these weapons and violent overthrow was unjustifiable because of the likely civilian deaths. Even the leaders of New Zealand, Germany and France were ignored. Clearly 'we' means the US and its supporters.

Who are the nasty leaders? Kim Jong-il from North Korea warrants a place and the junta in Myanmar deserves being relegated to memory land. Then there is wicked old Robert Mugabe in Zimbabwe. And what about? - but wait, these people have been horrible for as long as Mr Hussein and they have not been restructured? So my theory is wrong. What have I missed? Of course, it becomes clear when you think of the Iraq situation. Like a jigsaw puzzle all the pieces have to fit.

Those who take out a nasty leader must first have ensured the country has been under US (sorry, I mean UN) sanction for many years. It must be poverty stricken and defenceless. Inspectors must have been in the country just before the attack to oversee destruction of any defence capability. In addition it must be sitting on vast pots of oil that the big countries want and - here is the crunch - the daddy of one of those leaders must have made a mess of the first attempt to do the job.

So Mr Kim does not need to worry, especially as he has got a nuclear bomb or two, and none of the others quite fit the bill as they do not have any oil to speak of. I wonder who's going to be next?