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Tim Noonan

'No, seriously,  how did you get your tickets?' I asked.

'Do you really want to know?' she replied.

'Yeah, that's why I asked.'

'Some things are better left to the imagination,' she said with a sly wink.

Good point.

She was vivacious and engaging, stunning even. As I spoke with her, men walked by and bumped into a wall from gawking. One guy in a Captain Morgan outfit butted in front of me to ask if he could have his picture taken with her. 'Hey captain,' I said. 'The only way that outfit works is if you got a bottle of rum. So do you?'

'Nope, can't say I do,' he replied.

'Then get lost because I've got work to do here,' I said. Now where was I? Oh yes, your name.

'No names,' she said, and put her finger over her lips before disappearing into the crowd.

This is what it has come to at the Hong Kong Sevens. Tickets are scarcer than ever this year. This event, it seems, has arrived on the global calendar. And why not?

It's three days of rollicking debauchery in one of the world's most scenic stadiums filled with some of the world's most scenic women, not to mention a legion of boneheads playing dress-up as well as more amateur drunks than New Year's Eve.

No wonder this event has global cachet. Of course, it would help if the event had Hong Kong cachet as well. I mean, I understand we need to fill the hotels up for this thing, but so many people who have juice in Hong Kong are without tickets and unwilling to pay a ridiculous amount to get them.

They are outside looking in this weekend. Maybe they should move to Vancouver. A few guys from there told me how much they enjoyed the Sevens in Los Angeles last year. They were told if they really dig the Sevens, then get thee to Hong Kong. So they did, but of course they needed tickets.

They contacted the Hong Kong Rugby Union and found out if they spent HK$300 to join the union they would be entitled to buy two tickets each. Now they had four tickets, so they put two up for auction on the internet and sold a pair for US$800 to a woman in Hong Kong. They showed up in town this week, met the woman and she handed over the cash.  Nice work if you can get it.

'What did I do to get tickets?' asked Jessica Guevara, a fetching young woman in town from Manila. 'I just asked for them.'

Which is what you can do if you look like Jessica, who is here with another friend from Manila, Faith Amigo.

Actually, Faith's boyfriend had to scalp and said he paid HK$750 per ticket just for Saturday. Ouch, hope you enjoy the show, girls. I know it enjoys you.

'I remember walking up and buying a ticket on Sunday for HK$100 at the front gate,' said American Jon Zinke. 'Of course that was back in 1986. These days, it's next to impossible.'

Some of us, like Zinke, remember the old days, sitting on rough wooden benches that would reek of sun-baked beer by Sunday afternoon. 'Now you have to beg, borrow or steal,' said Zinke, who was lucky enough to score a few passes to a private box. 'It's the way to go.'

Indeed, for those who are lucky enough, it begs the question;  how did you get into a private box?



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