South China Morning Post
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Present advice

Rachel Plecas
Why you can trust SCMP

The days when a bride and groom moved directly from their parents' homes into their marital home are waning, even in traditional Hong Kong.

Odds are, by the time you get married, you will have lived on your own or with your partner before tying the knot. This reality has created a significant shift in the ritual of registering for wedding gifts because most couples will already own the standard wedding gifts of yore, such as kitchen appliances, linen and other small household items.

A wedding registry is still a good idea, and most shops and large department stores will have staff trained to help with the process. Not only does it help couples by guiding their guests towards the gifts that will be most useful and desirable, but it helps guests select a gift easily.

Local businesswoman Nunu Luan has taken wedding registry in a new direction with Hong Kong's only online registry, Double Happiness (www.doublehappiness.com.hk), which offers solutions for today's contemporary couples with offers such as a group gift. It has a registry of gifts from more than 100 shops, merchants and brands. 'We have a partial payment option so that a couple may decide all they need and want is a EuroCave wine storage unit or a flat-screen TV, and their guests can contribute towards one joint gift,' Ms Luan says.

'I was told the concept of an online registry site wouldn't work in Hong Kong because everyone still wanted lai see [red packet cash], but our customers represent a true mix of cultures and we've had an equal response from both Chinese and western [clients].'

Creative gift-giving becomes more important when the couple has what they need already, especially when they are entering a second marriage for one or both parties. Consider these alternative gift ideas, depending on the couple's personalities.

Whether having something made to suit the couple's taste or made from a personal item, such as a photograph, bespoke gifts can remain in a family and take on heirloom status through time. Game sets such as mahjong, dominos, Monopoly or Scrabble can be created in a variety of materials and tailored to specifications. See www.elderluxe.com for ideas.

Another idea is to use a personal item, such as a photograph, the wedding invitation or some other memento, to create a piece of decorative art for the couple's home.

A gift that any couple will surely appreciate is a handmade, hand-bound photograph album with their name and wedding date embossed on the cover. For an album of true keepsake quality, check out Asprey, Smythson or a comparable leather goods manufacturer.

If a couple is known for their support of a particular cause, then the decision of where to make a donation in lieu of presenting a wrapped wedding gift is much easier. However, if their particular preferences are unknown to you, try making a donation through a microcredit organisation such as Kiva (www.kiva.org). Kiva arranges funds for loans through private investors to be made to entrepreneurs in third-world countries. The loans are paid back as the small business grows.
Alternatively, a gift can be made by planting a tree in the couple's name (www.celebrationforest.com) in an effort to improve global air quality, or membership in an organisation, such as Nature Conservancy, can be bought online and comes with multiple benefits.

Gift registry tips for couples

Register three to four months before the wedding to give guests enough time to make their purchases.

Select at least one gift for each guest invited.

Select gifts of various pricing points so that there is something within everyone's price range.

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