An eye for an eye gets you nowhere

PUBLISHED : Friday, 28 November, 2008, 12:00am
UPDATED : Friday, 28 November, 2008, 12:00am

If someone does something bad to you and then you do something bad to them, the situation will not improve.

If you fight with someone and you win, they are likely to take revenge.

After that, you would want to fight with them again. It is a vicious cycle.

Winning a fight means bringing on more trouble. We should stop fighting each other and become friends. Two wrongs don't make a right.

Lam Tsz-hin, Tsuen Wan Public Ho Chuen Yiu Memorial College

From the Editor

Thank you for your letter, Tsz-hin. You're right: revenge is never the solution.

Of course, it is natural to be upset if someone does something to hurt you or your feelings. And revenge is a natural reaction. But it doesn't achieve anything.

As hard as it may seem, you will feel better eventually if you can be the bigger person and ignore the hurtful behaviour.

If you allow the vicious cycle to develop, both of you will get increasingly bitter. You will both get hurt each time the other attacks.

Whoever 'wins' will experience what is called a pyrrhic victory - they may be the winner, but they'll have suffered many losses to get there.

Instead, why not ask your 'attacker' why they felt they had to behave that way? Alternatively, just turn away, and know that you are acting in the right.

Karly, Sub-editor