Secret of harmonious police marriage comes down to two words

PUBLISHED : Saturday, 14 March, 2009, 12:00am
UPDATED : Saturday, 14 March, 2009, 12:00am

The job of a police officer is highly stressful, a line of work that often involves staring right into the heart of darkness. No wonder it often puts a strain on marriages. So you might expect the force to run high-quality sophisticated counselling services. But some 'tips on harmonious marriage' by the Hong Kong Catholic Marriage Advisory Council, which offers counselling for married officers, are rather revealing.

Essentially, 'men need respect and women need love', says the council. So when husbands are not shown proper respect and wives do not feel love, relationships hit the rocks. It's that simple. Therefore, people who experience difficulties in their marriages should always ask themselves the following questions, reproduced here from the English-language Offbeat internal police newspaper.

'For wives: will what I am going to say or do make him feel disrespected?

'For husbands: will what I am going to say or do make her feel ignored?

'The following signs should be interpreted as calls for love.

'For wives: when he ignores you or tried to stay away from you, he actually calls for your respect!

'For husbands: when she is angry or loses her temper, she actually calls for your loving care!'

We don't know how effective this is, but call it the Aretha Franklin school of counselling, as the Queen of Soul likes to sing: 'R-E-S-P-E-C-T.'