Failing to make the cut doesn't mean child's sporting career is over

My son is mad about sport and spends most of his spare time playing football. He's desperate to be on the school football team but never gets picked. He's devastated, and I think this is affecting his confidence and enjoyment of school, especially as some of his friends are on the team. The PE teacher says he is one of the better players but not quite good enough. Shouldn't everyone be given a chance?

This situation is unfortunate, as football is obviously one of your son's passions. It must be particularly hard for him if his friends are on the school team.

This can have one of two possible impacts. Either he could be inspired to try even harder to join his friends, or he could get into a negative mind-set and let it affect other aspects of his life, as you are suggesting may be the case.

However, in a similar way as some of the most able and talented students in academic subjects may represent the school in maths, chess or debating competitions, school sports teams usually consist - and quite rightly so - of the pupils who perform the best.

This gives these children the chance to shine and represent their school, just as a talented musician would play in the school orchestra or a confident actor would take a lead part in the school play.

For sporting individuals, in particular, this can be a vital boost, especially if they struggle in the classroom. Success in sport may be one of their few chances to shine.