61 sq ft flats in Hong Kong? Why not just bury us in coffins and be done with it?
Yonden Lhatoo despairs at the prospect of property developers selling ever-tinier homes to maximise profits at a cost to humanity
“I’m down so low ... I declare I’m lookin’ up at down.” Blues musician Big Bill Broonzy sang these famous words in a summation of the sense of hopelessness prevalent during the Great Depression of the 1930s.
Fast forward to the present, and British comedian John Oliver captures the essence of sinking to new lows in his own irreverent style. “Let me just remind you that last Sunday, I told you if you looked above the clouds, you would see rock bottom. But if you look up there now ... you will see, right up in the distance, where we were this time last week. Because since then, we have sunk so low, we are breaking through the earth’s crust, where drowning in boiling magma will come as sweet, sweet relief.”
Oliver was talking about the depths to which the US presidential race has sunk, but allow me to borrow his wicked words to illustrate what’s happening to Hong Kong’s property market.
Henderson Land to unveil tiny flats in North Point amid Hong Kong’s hot property market
Even Stanley Prison offers more living space for criminals, with the standard jail cell measuring a relatively luxurious 80.7 sq ft.
The only thing left now is to put us all in coffins and be done with it.
And since this is Hong Kong, after all, I wouldn’t put it past our developers. You only have to look at the price-gouging business of running columbariums, where Hongkongers are forced to store the ashes of the deceased in 1 sq ft wall niches.
Niche market: Hong Kong’s dead should not have to wait in line for an urn space
People get emotional about killer whales in captivity, and how confining them in their marine park tanks is the equivalent of keeping a human in a bath tub all his or her life. Boredom, depression and frustration lead to self-harm and aggression.
Hello? That ring a bell, humans in Hong Kong?
Far more informed and astute commentators than myself have linked the social problems in our city, especially the growing tendency among youth to lash out at the establishment, to housing. It’s just so basic.
When – not if – we have the next iteration of the Mong Kok riot, let’s not ask ‘why’ or ‘how’ any more
When – not if – we have the next iteration of the Mong Kok riot, let’s not ask “why” or “how” any more. Our Ides of March is there for all to see.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. There is enough land and wealth in Hong Kong to house every citizen in relative comfort and dignity. What there is an acute dearth of is the guts, political will and generosity to achieve it.
And yet you heard development minister Paul Chan Mo-po: “The government does not have a magic wand to create land out of nothing.”
Nobody is expecting you to wave any magic wand, Professor Dumbledore. You may be one of our harder-working ministers, but it’s time we all snap out of our lotos-eating reverie and get cracking on the obvious solutions.
There’s no shortage of land for housing in Hong Kong, only a lack of will to act for the people
For a start, minister, do something about developers’ ample land banks and shameful practice of hoarding empty flats to keep property prices artificially inflated and above the reach of the average Hongkonger.
I can see the orcas bursting out of their tanks already in outrage.
Yonden Lhatoo is a senior editor at the Post
