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HK Magazine Archive

News Limericks

PUBLISHED : Wednesday, 19 August, 2015, 11:16am
UPDATED : Wednesday, 19 October, 2016, 4:47pm

Sure, you probably get your news online. But do you get your news online... IN LIMERICK FORM?

Uber, a willing young startup
Has cab drivers acting like martyrs.
They say “This disruption
Is down to corruption!”
Big words, when you won’t cross the harbor.

The Liberal Party is wishin’
To visit Beijing on a mission.
Do they want to get cozy
With CCP cronies?
Or just land a date night with Jinping?

Last month, phone scams made a ruckus:
Stole one hundred million from suckers.
If they call you up next
Engage in phone sex
‘Til they hang up disgusted, the fuckers.

Our wall trees, they come down non-stop
We’re told they’re not safe, must be chopped.
So we’re losing our banyans
And all their companions:
Now explain why you’re razing pawn shops?

“Occupy’s made the city less livable!”
Says a study we don’t think admissible.
Are you confused? On a diet?
Mixed “protest” with “riot?”
Take it back, ‘cause that shit’s unforgivable…

To pass his reform with felicity
CY spent $5 mil on publicity.
Tax bucks that enthused few;
Your own side still screwed you:
Pay peanuts, get monkeys in this city.