Mr Dapper: And you think a pretentious, hipster replacement cover won’t be “naff”, as you call it? Unless your black silicone case is faulty, do yourself and the environment a favour and let it do its job. Make style statements in smarter ways, such as colourful pocket squares or bespoke shirts.
Mr Dandy: An iPhone 4? How retro! Geez, looks like Dapper needs a holiday! I was going to lift his mood with an amazing case. Then I remembered he doesn’t even have an iPhone! Jack Spade’s awesome Woody hard shell will land at Kapok any day now (HK$400; 3 Sun Street, Wan Chai, tel: 2520 0114; www.jackspade.com). Studio A has loads of great covers, including the GGMM Timberland for iPhone in sapele or rosewood (HK$148 each; Style House, 310 Gloucester Road, Causeway Bay, tel: 2881 5738). Other options include DG Lifestyle (Pacific Place, Admiralty, tel: 2918 4811), which has a huge display of phone cases (about HK$100 for plain to HK$798 for the hi-tech Vapor Pro by Element Case). Hong Kong-based SigniCase has readyor custom-made ones in bamboo, walnut or sapele (HK$298 and up; www.signicase.com). Budget shoppers will love the surprisingly wide selection in markets such as Li Yuen Street East, where I recently found real wood (HK$128) and wood-like cases (HK$69).

Mr Dandy: I hate to contradict your dad and shatter your illusions, but tux-print tees are cheesy. Always. No exceptions. Speaking of old guys, I would love to see the look on Dapper’s face if I turned up in one of them. Maybe that’s it. Maybe you and your dad are pranksters who think it’s funny to horrify people with embarrassing fashion. In that case, count me in! I doublechecked with a bunch of cool brands known for their graphic tees, but even the most outrageous labels have steered clear of the faux formal look. In the weird and wonderful world of the web, however, there are tons to choose from. For example, www.tuxedotshirts.com delivers to Hong Kong and makes a few designs in many colours, with short or long sleeves (HK$124 and up). For more, check out the selection at amazon.com.
Mr Dapper: It goes without saying that one should never wear a T-shirt in anything but the most casual of environments, and never to a formal occasion. If you cannot find a graphic T-shirt to your liking, I suggest you avail yourself of the excellent printing services in Hong Kong. Via websites such as t-shirts.com.hk and brandhk.com, it is possible to have the shirt you desire printed to your specifications (minimum orders may apply). You will find tuxedo artwork by the simplest of Google searches. One example can be viewed at helpful arts and crafts blog www.howaboutorange.blogspot.hk.