Beware Pupketeers! Today is Friday the 13th, a day when bad things are meant to happen, an unlucky day, a woeful day. Today is a good day to stay in bed - as if I needed an excuse, ha ha! Well, I do need to recover from my awesome trip to Thailand.
Just like Chinese people don't like the number four, Westerners don't like the number 13. As an intrepid pup reporter, I had to ask ... why?
So I asked deputy editor Karly, who was a bit vague. She said: 'It has something to do with the Bible.' I thought I'd give it a quick read and find out. Um, that's not going to be quick. So I had to look elsewhere.
Then I asked the editor and she said it had to do with having 13 people at the Last Supper. That's the last time Jesus ate with his 12 apostles before he was crucified. But, he'd had 12 apostles all along, hadn't he? And surely they had all eaten together before.
I learned 13 turns make a traditional hangman's noose - that's gotta be unlucky, specially for the person being hanged, no?
The idea that Friday the 13th was something to worry about was made popular in pop culture with the movie Friday the 13th. (I think it was probably most unfortunate for people who had to watch it twice.)
The number 13 also caused a headache for monks working on a lunar calendar. If they had 13 full moons, instead of 12, they had to redo their calendar, because they ended up with 13 months for that year, instead of 12. (Erm, I don't know why, ask a maths expert.) The monks had to arrange all the parties for the religious calendar and so having the extra month was a challenge for them.
Just so you know, this year has three of these black days. All of them are 13 weeks apart, Muhahahaha. That was my evil laugh right there. Are you scared yet?
So let me give you some hints on how to deal with this day. Don't get out of bed. Order food in. Play a few video games. Don't get together with friends for a meal because you might end up as a group of 13 people which is bad luck. It's not just the Christians who say this - in Norse mythology, 12 good gods were hanging out together when the evil Loki decided to ruin their party. That did not end well, if you know what I mean.
Also, you shouldn't walk under ladders, 'cos stuff could fall on your head. And stay away from black cats. Well, I'd say stay away from all cats, all the time. I mean, what do they bring to the table?
Which reminds me of a good joke I heard yesterday. Why do people give cats names? They never come when you call them anyway.