Raise your glasses, ladies and gentlemen, to this month's poster boy for the gross stupidity of the human race: Lewis Hamilton. Let's make sure we smash those glasses, too; we don't want to miss an opportunity for needless waste.
As humanity tries to grasp the horrors of a future with a heated atmosphere but without oil, we continue to host and get excited by Formula One, a sport that seems to have been designed primarily to exacerbate those two problems. Not only are gallons and gallons of fuel burned during the races and the preceding practice laps, but the carbon footprint of the sport is vastly inflated by the constant relocating of men and machinery around the planet. From Shanghai, last week, to Istanbul, for the May 8 race. And for what? To prove that one man and his extensive, expensive team are ever-so-slightly faster than another - at least until the next race.
Furthermore, Formula One is just the tip of the fast-melting iceberg. All over the world people are racing against one another - on motorbikes and in rally cars, monster trucks, power boats and all manner of gas-guzzling vehicles. We should be thankful, at least, that air races are no longer popular.
Instead of Hamilton, we should perhaps be celebrating Pierre Feller, the Luxembourg champion at the third German office chair championships (right) in the town of Bad Konig-Zell in Hesse, held last weekend. There again, I dare say some office furniture was retired ahead of its time as a result of that particular competition.