News Quiz

1) Chief Executive CY Leung joined Facebook this week. His first post was…
a) Photos of the flowers CY has been growing and appreciating.
b) Just the words “CY Leung” repeated over and over again,
a terrified lonely voice calling into the void.
c) A dick pic on Chief Secretary Carrie Lam’s wall.

2) Financial Secretary John Tsang lamented “soaring” wages in low-skilled jobs this week, complaining that rising wages…
a) Are making it hard for owners of small businesses to cope.
b) Are making it difficult for self-respecting Financial Secretaries, who are paid a mere $300,000 per month, to set themselves apart from the nasty common folk.
c) Will soon get to the point where John Tsang will not be able to afford an indentured servant whose only role is to comb his luxurious whiskers.

3) The WHO has announced that processed meat is carcinogenic. This news has…
a) Terrified the city’s preserved meats industry, who are worried that it will hit their profits.
b) Got mainland producers of char siu made from cardboard scenting a legitimate business opportunity.
c) Made vegans even more smug than ever.

4) A barge crashed into Kap Shui Mun Bridge last week, leading to the closure of the Lantau Link to the airport and leaving thousands stranded. This incident…
a) Has brought to light the city’s dependence on a single route to the airport, leading the government to review their contingency plans.
b) Was nowhere near as dramatic as you’d assume a ship crashing into a bridge would actually be.
c) Disappointed geeks and nerds across the territory, who were hoping that such a major road closure would be reserved for the emergence of Godzilla, King of the Monsters, bent on rampaging through the city.

5) The Hong Kong Productivity Council has just launched the city’s first locally designed electric bus. Its makers hope it will…
a) Boost the SAR’s electric vehicle industry to new heights.
b) Be able to run on spare parts scrounged from the Apliu Street electronics flea market, like every other self-respecting Hong Kong device.
c) Be able to merge with several other electric buses and transform into a giant bus-robot to battle Godzilla, King of the Monsters, who is due in town any day now.

6) 124 people were injured on a high-speed ferry traveling from Macau to Hong Kong last week, after the ferry...
a) Struck what is believed to be a rubber tire south of Lantau.
b) Came under attack from a pod of armored pink dolphins, who have organized a guerilla resistance in response to the slow erosion of their territorial waters.
c) Was assailed by the atomic breath of Godzilla, King of the Monsters, who is DEFINITELY on the way.