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  • Dec 19, 2014
  • Updated: 12:00pm
Hong Kong Sevens
PUBLISHED : Wednesday, 13 March, 2013, 2:45pm
UPDATED : Wednesday, 13 March, 2013, 2:54pm

Survival of the fittest

BIO

New Zealand broadcaster Jed Thian is recognised as the founder of alternative sports commentary worldwide through his online creation, the Alternative Rugby Commentary. Performing live around the world as well as regular appearances on the BBC, RTE in Ireland and Television New Zealand, demand for his unique take on rugby and world have grown massively since trading the radio for the internet.
 

I simply must remember that sleeping isn’t evil, in fact it’s good for me.
Still, Tuesday night is where the trouble really starts … maybe I should arrive later in the week?
No, that would only cause more problems as I face “catch-up” mode.
Not that that’s a problem, obviously I am robust.
It’s just it makes me feel a little cheap…no, arrive the before Sunday as planned.
Good, that’s settled.
Stay Wan Chai? Probably.
Why? Why not, it’s got an Ebeneezer’s … perfect, still I think they scrimp a little on the pepperoni these days.
Okay good, got that sorted.
Still, Tuesday is a problem, I mean Tuesday is actually Thursday … well, Friday actually, by the time it stops.
Well it is, isn’t it, be honest.
The first four times it has been anyway.
Preparation is the key; how many times have I said that in the past…?
Be prepared to stay away from the usual suspects, that’s the idea. Brilliant strategy! MUST BE EMPLOYED!
That means I’m staying in the subway by the racecourse then.
Think I’ll bin that approach.
Maybe I’ll do some sight seeing this time?
Markets and touristy type things, pictures and the such.
Art galleries?
Shopping?
I guess bar hopping is shopping, sort of.
Pictures, that’s not really a good idea is it Jedi … no, I suppose not.
Naturally the problem is that I am in such dynamic form, why shouldn’t Hong Kong feel the awesomeness of my swag?
I’ve got a lot of love to give!
I feel torn … mind you it’s a Sagittarian’s lot, constantly fighting the urge… infrequently winning, hardly ever losing.
It’s tough on the others, that’s for certain.
Mind you the Year of the Snake may have some influence.
Come on, big fella, have some belief in your ability!
The Six Nations has been a good start to the year, a little hairy in parts.
In some parts that’s a good thing.
Made a statement in Taffs Well, left an impression on Chippy Lane, love the curry, cheese, half’n’half.
Clark’s Pies, no horsemeat in those … not much of any meat to be honest, lots of pastry though, that’s always a bonus.
Yes, Cardiff, Swansea, Llanelli, Taffs Well and Caroline Street, all of them seen off with no fuss.
The grimy pub off Old Street, Shoreditch House, the Jake Bugg afterparty, breakfast with Will Carling all taken in stride.
Well, Carling was hard work … as usual, still he paid, so fair play.
Never knew you could claim bacon as an expense.
Still no bar too big or too small or too full of Englishmen.
I am showing the form of a true international.
You earn the right to go wide.
But Hong Kong is different.
The intensity of masses, the wait for taxis.
The buffets, after all these years on the road, still my arch nemesis.
One day I’ll be able to walk past you.
So let me just idiot-check this again.
Arrive Sunday.
Buffet breakfast Monday.
Then some sightseeing … maybe a lap on the tram?
Red Meat Monday, steak, eggs and chips, Argentine style.
Tuesday morning, might go to the gym.
Tuesday night, clearly there’s no way around it, I’ll just have to toughen up.
Wednesday, Kowloon Tens, not a trip to the +852 without hitting out on the dark side.
Wednesday evening? Maybe the nags, definitely Ladies Night … hopefully Jonny Rees leaves some room on the bar for me.
Ebeneezer’s for breakfast on Thursday.
Footy Club Tens later that day, come on the APBs!
Few beers with the boys, few beers with the punters, a few beers before breakfast at … Ebeneezer’s.
Friday, sleep in until Midday …? Long Lunch?
Saturday morning, bucket of KFC with Mikey Diamond in the South Stand.
Fancy dress this year? Theme has to be horse meat, I’m sure the lads can Findus something ... hahahaha!
See what I did there?
No..?
Never mind.
About the only thing I can’t get fit for is the flight.
One day I’ll be able to turn left at the door … one day.
Of course complimentary drinks do help one travel in the altered state of mind one is accustomed to.
But when the doors close at Heathrow there’s no sleep until Hong Kong.
And in Hong Kong, there’s no sleep until March 25th.

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