Needless to say, Ra, despite the fact that he can move pyramids through space and has a raft of special effects at his command, throws up his hands in despair at the sight of Kurt Russell's diabolical 'buzz' haircut.

Directed by Roland Emmerlich (Universal Soldier), Stargate is undoubtedly an ambitious and expensively-mounted project. And for the first hour or so, it almost comes off. But the trouble with Egyptian mumbo-jumbo, extraterrestrials and alien planets is that the whole production can quickly look like a hieroglyphic - something Emmerlich pulls off with aplomb. If you're looking for a sign, check out the cast list as the credits roll; names that are almost more exotic than the plot, and equally obscure.

Everything is in this picture - it's Luke Skywalker (Star Wars) mating with She; it's every action film you've ever seen, blended with those odd-ball Italian epics of the 60s; it's Star Trek and Dune meets The Empire Strikes Back; almost every scene is lifted from another movie, only most other movies have better villains than Jaye Davidson, who moves around the set like one of the Thunderbirds.

Stargate is proof that humans should stick to Earth until they can make better pictures. Sci-fi fans may be satisfied by a slew of special effects but, disappointingly, they're not anything we haven't seen already.

JUNIOR marks the second time Arnold Schwarzenegger, Danny DeVito and director Ivan Reitman have teamed up. Their first collaboration, Twins, was far more successful; Junior has only managed to scrape together US$30 million in America so far.

There's only one gag running throughout this comedy - Arnold 'The Terminator' Schwarzenegger as the world's first pregnant man who gets to experience the gamut of female emotions as his hormones run wild. Reitman hasn't even bothered setting up a second scenario whereby the world's first pregnant man is pursued by crazed Latin American drug cartels, for example; Junior has one simple concept and Reitman sticks by it faithfully.

And that, in the end, is Junior's main problem. Once it has been established that Arnold is pregnant, the movie goes nowhere as he painfully inches towards the birth. Sadly, even DeVito is sidelined to make way for endless scenes where Schwarzenegger gets in touch with his female side and even dresses up as a woman in the final, dreadful sequences.

Arnold plays Dr Alex Hesse, a humourless scientist who has been working on a miracle drug called Expectorane with his colleague Dr Larry Arbogast (De Vito) for years. Although they are certain their drug can ensure healthy pregnancies, the FDA (Federal Drug Authority) and the University pull the plug on their research at the last minute. Their laboratory is taken over by wacko British scientist Dr Diana Reddin (Emma Thompson). Arbogast then decides to steal a frozen egg from Reddin and implant it in the most unlikely place - inside Hesse's body.

As Hesse's body reacts to his pregnancy, the doctor experiences wild hormonal fluctuations and this leads him into a romantic tryst with Emma Thompson, who at this point plays a 'British eccentric' by rote.

As Junior limps towards a conclusion, it becomes obvious that the movie is weighted lop-sidedly towards Schwarzenegger and he is out of his depth. He needs more of DeVito, in particular, as a wise-cracking sidekick. But DeVito's role is sketchy at best, and this is probably where the film suffers most. Casting Schwarzenegger as the world's first pregnant man may be a strong concept, but he still needs more backup than Junior affords.

Thompson isn't given too much screen-time, but she makes the most of it by chewing every prop in her reach. This routine is definitely wearing thin. Schwarzenegger, meantime, does display a more 'human' side - he's definitely come on in leaps and bounds - but Junior could justifiably be classified 'for fans only'.

Stargate, Park, Liberty, Dynasty, Cosmos, Prince, UA Times Square, Queensway, Whampoa and Sha Tin, and Tuen Mun and Yuen Long cinemas; Junior, the Panasia Circuit and New York and Ocean Theatres.