YOU do not need me to tell you that Police Academy 5 (Pearl, 9.30pm), the sequel even Steve Guttenberg would not appear in, is a bit of a waste of space. And to think there was still one more to come, Police Academy 6.
The original Police Academy, released in 1984, was not perfect. Attempts to improve on it became increasingly embarrassing, but the producers persevered. All of the films contain the obligatory quota of tastelessness and sexism. There are no plots; just a series of set pieces and pea-brained gags linked by some amateurish performances.
Three of the original stars who made it as far as number five are George Gaynes (the police chief), Bubba Smith and Michael Winslow, the fellow who does the sound effects.
Or try Charade (World, 9.35pm), which has got to be alright because it stars Audrey Hepburn and Cary Grant. Grant was pushing 60 when this was filmed, but disguises the fact by taking a shower fully-clothed.
Charade is a load of sub-Hitchcockian nonsense, but charming and entertaining, with a lot to offer beyond the plot. Hepburn's romance with the suave Grant is delightfully-handled, the location photography, in Paris, is exquisite and the rooftop fight scene between Grant and George Kennedy is as good a piece of drama as you will find in a film not directed by Hitchcock himself.
Hepburn is Regina 'Reggie' Lambert, a woman of means, who returns from a ski trip to find her Paris home ransacked and her husband dead. His funeral is attended by three curious thugs - played by James Coburn, George Kennedy and Ned Glass - each of whom prods and pokes, just to make sure that the corpse is indeed a corpse.
CIA man Walter Matthau confuses things by telling Reggie her husband was part of a gang which, during World War II, stole and stashed away US$250,000. Grant confuses things further by offering his assistance.