CHIP Weber is a small businessman in Hong Kong. The 40-year-old runs his own sports coaching company, doing the paperwork and the training himself. Good-natured and smiling, you would never believe his secret obsession: death.
For some reason he cannot explain even to himself, the American is fascinated by unusual fatalities and bizarre accidents. He has been collecting relevant stories from newspapers for years, and is working on a book on the oddest such incidents of recent years.
Before he finishes his project and finds a real publisher, he is distributing to friends and contacts in Hong Kong a photocopied book of his favourite real-life 'unhappy endings' stories.
Given the appetite for the absurd that this column's readers have repeatedly demonstrated, I thought you might enjoy some extracts. These are raw and unedited examples of the reports Chip has collected from around the world: A SUDDEN gust of window blew a portable toilet off the fourth floor of a building - and crushed a construction worker to death . . . . The portable potty had been placed on the fourth floor of the building for the convenience of the men working there . . . . 'It was a tragedy but it could have been worse,' said a co-worker. 'Fortunately no one was using the toilet.' POLICE said they were investigating the death of a man who was killed after being hit by a turnip that was thrown from a passing car. The attack apparently was carried out by a gang whose members toss vegetables at random at people. Another man suffered stomach injuries after being hit by a cabbage, police said.
RUSSELL Berkley claims his love life went down the drain when someone pulled a plug in a hospital whirlpool. His left testicle was sucked into the pipe with the water. 'I know it wasn't more than 30 seconds, but it felt like forever,' said Berkley.
A BODY that was discovered in the chimney of a barbecue restaurant was identified as that of a handyman reported missing three years ago . . . . Witnesses described the body as 'smoked'.
A SOFT drink machine robbed a teen of his change, then toppled over and killed him when he tried to get his can of soda pop out.
