We’ve all heard of the infamous “tiger mom” style of parenting, but a new term, helicopter parent, is emerging. A helicopter parent is a parent who takes an excessive interest in the life of their children. Helicopter parents earned the name because, like helicopters, they hover overhead. So-called helicopter parents first made headlines on business school campuses a few years ago when they began trying to direct everything in their new MBA student’s higher education - from their children's course schedules to the people they roomed with.
Helicopter parents are not a new phenomenon. For over a decade, parents have become deeply involved in the undergraduate admission process of their high school children. Ten years later, those same parents are now becoming equally invested in the decisions of their grown child to go to business school. Admission consultants say they have noticed a significant increase in parental involvement in recent years. The problem is that however well-intentioned the involvement, parents can sometimes stand in the way of their own children’s higher education and eventually, even their future success. Students wishing to pursue an MBA need to share this list of Do’s and Don’ts with their helicopter parents to avoid embarrassing or detrimental situations.
DON’Ts:
● Helicopter parents should not push their children to apply for graduate school before they are ready, committed, and eager for higher education. Doing so may cause resistance, resentment, and maybe even failure.
● Accompany the applicant to information sessions, campus visits, alumni events, or class observations. These are better left for the student to explore on their own in order to best assess if a particular school or program will be a proper fit for their interests and career goals.
● Ghostwrite essays or recommendations yourself or pay someone else to do it. Besides being morally questionable, in the end, this helps no one.
● Contact the admissions office, for any reason, at any time on your child’s behalf.
DO’s:
● Helicopter parents need to remind themselves that this is not THEIR candidacy or application, but their child’s.
● Keep in mind that the MBA admissions process is very different than undergraduate admissions where parents are expected and encouraged to participate.
● Ask questions and encourage reflection. Discuss with your prospective MBA what their professional and higher education goals are and how they feel an MBA would help achieve such goals.
● Encourage research. There are several great business schools to choose from, take the time to find the best fit.
● Volunteer to proofread the final application for spelling or grammar errors only, not for content.
● Watch for signs that their involvement is adding stress and, if so, back off immediately.
● Encourage the applicant to reapply if rejected. Unlike undergraduate applications, there are “do-overs.”
It’s natural for parents to want to help their children, but it’s crucial to make the transition from parent to consultant once a child goes to college or seeks full-time employment. Overbearing parents can hinder an MBA’s success and if the parent is not establishing appropriate boundaries, then the child must. Helicopter parents need to ask themselves how their student is really going to navigate their own academic and professional careers when they need to if they aren’t allowed to do it on their own. This simple list of DO’s and DON’Ts will help helicopter parents of MBA students strike a healthy balance between support and meddling.