IT is hard to resist the observation that with local wine in generous supply and the brandy rated superior to that from France - a judgment, incidentally, made by a Frenchman - the compensations for England's footballers travelling to Moldova this weekend are substantial.
Of course, unless Glenn Hoddle's faith in the Continental approach includes alcohol with the pre-match meal, the opportunity for serious refreshment for Paul Gascoigne, Teddy Sheringham and those others who changed forever the profile of the dentist's chair, might well depend on them surviving Sunday's World Cup experience with their reputations intact.
Commencing a new qualifying campaign in such strange and stark surroundings can never be ideal but surely defeat for Hoddle's side is unthinkable? After all, who are the luminaries from the Moldovan league - a 14-club competition which struggles to capture the attention of even the local inhabitants - to stand tall alongside the heroes of the Premiership? Wales made much the same mistake and stumbled blindly into the man-trap, paying heavily two years ago for disastrous preparation with a shock 3-2 defeat and acute embarrassment from which their European Championship ambitions could never recover. Yet there are several reasons why England can expect a more successful outcome.
Hoddle, clearly, has better players from whom to choose. For Moldova's first competitive home fixture since independence from the former Soviet Union was granted in 1991, Wales were lacking Mark Hughes, Ian Rush, Ryan Giggs and Dean Saunders and were woefully inexperienced at that level. Strong character was required, such was the strength of nationalist clamour, but the stand-ins from the First Division were unable to cope.
Moldova are now more experienced members of football's international community and as such the English Football Association has found communications easier than did its Cardiff colleagues. So England have booked into the best hotel in Kishinev, and avoided 'Cockroach City' which is how Neville Southall and Co branded their dismal accommodation.
An added factor will be the admiration, bordering on awe, that the Moldovans have for their visitors. The likes of Gascoigne, Alan Shearer and Paul Ince are held in high esteem. Those making reconnaissance missions to the Moldovan capital in recent weeks have found their attempts to gather information about the home side lost in a never-ending series of requests about Hoddle's first international team, and, in particular, 'your GBP15-million man'.
Even the best home players hardly merit a second glance from the impoverished folk who, in a country of 4.3 million sandwiched between Romania and the Ukraine, are forced to scratch out an unenviable living from tiny roadside stalls offering the most basic wares for sale.
