If you are sick of singles bars and blind dates, there is always the romantic netherworld of the lonely - the 'In Search Of' ad.
For example, healthy males might be attracted to an Internet ad placed by Ruby Gill, who says: 'Come on big boy and love me! I know you're out there . . .' It is clear Ms Gill is someone you can take home to mother, since she describes herself as 'loving, sincere, strong, passionate, faithful and wanting to share my love'.
But before you buy a dozen red roses and head off to her place of abode in Texas, bear in mind you may have a little trouble gaining entry to hand them to her. Ms Gill may be loving and sharing, but she is also locked up in a high-security prison in the Lone Star State.
Then there is Edward D Rimka, whose advertisement is worthy of Homer. He writes: 'I pray for a mythical Prometheus to steal fire from the Gods and return to banish the darkness in my prison' - the prison being not merely metaphorical, but a maximum-security slammer in Detroit. Rimka is honest enough to add he is doing 15 years for violent armed robbery.
These and hundreds of other jailbirds are barred for security reasons from using computers which will allow them anywhere near the 'Net. But they are now able to look for potential soulmates through a new web page service aptly titled Cyberspace Inmates.
Sensing that even the nation's felons deserve love, the web page was launched eight months ago by a Missouri housewife, Rene Mulkey, who is perfectly law-abiding but appears to have an unusual interest in the criminal.