For three years, Alba and Mark Foreman have had an attractive display of dried flowers from London outside their flat in Dynasty Court, Mid-Levels. The other day, Alba found a note on the flowers. 'To upkeep an unique image of the property, we are hereby serving you a final notice to remove this/these object(s) from the common area within 24 hours. After then, we will arrange to have it/them disposed without further notice. You will be responsible for the cost of removal if any and our office hold no liabilities at all whatsoever on the loss of this/ these object(s).' It was signed Dynasty Court Estate Management Office. This office sets a new standard for rude treatment of one's own paymasters. First, it is decidedly bad to send someone a 'final notice' when it is the first notice you have given them. Second, to treat a bunch of flowers as if it was a nuclear weapon needing special and expensive disposal is the height of imbecility. Alba obediently took the flowers inside and didn't make a fuss, but Dynasty Court managers get our duffers of the week award. Karen McMahon of Champagne Chic notes that Virgin Atlantic is advertising for an in-flight beauty therapist on trips to Tokyo and elsewhere. 'You'll need to be a confident swimmer,' says the ad. Why? Do they have to swim home? Letter to shareholders and owners of flats in The Sea Ranch from Holiday Resorts (HK): 'Our new assistant manager is Mr Mattan Lam Kwok Cheung . . . Your generous support to him is mostly appreciated.' It is mostly appreciated, but perhaps a little bit resented. When the jockey club decided to allow married jockeys Sherie Kong and Eric Legrix to live together, a turf correspondent commented that the move 'resulted in eyebrows'. Old China hand Geoffrey Somers, former editor of the former Window magazine, commented: 'This is a new revelation about inter-racial marriage.' John Philp recently returned to Hong Kong from Phuket in Thailand. 'Some hotels and major retail operations there have adopted an enterprising method of coping with the nation's recent currency devaluation - they ignore it,' he said. 'While banks were changing Hong Kong dollars at four baht to $1, they were offering customers only three baht, more than a month after the baht devalued.' Offenders included the Metropole Hotel in Phuket town, a retailer called The Silk Master, and several big jewellery shops. This is outrageous behaviour that deprives innocent tourists of a huge proportion of their cash. Tourists in Hong Kong have never had to go to con-men to make spectacularly bad deals when changing currency. Any branch of Chequepoint will do. Alan Wright of Mount Nicholson Gap writes to tell me that the manufacturer of water mains covers on Black's Link is 'Lee Ki Lee'. While mildly amusing in itself, this tiny snippet elicited a look of horror from this columnist's publisher. Leaky Lee is a character from one of my books, and the real one can now sue us. Set lunch at the Media Cafe in Tsim Sha Tsui: 'Hairiness Chicken Rice'. (Spotter: Lawrence Topp of Standard Chartered Bank.) This tale, sent in by Vicky Yuen, is respectfully dedicated to the memory of Princess Diana: A journalist had written a report on Kuwait before the Gulf War, and noted that women walked 10 feet behind their husbands. She returned to Kuwait recently and observed men now walked behind their wives. 'What enabled women here to achieve this reversal of roles?' she asked. 'Land mines,' a woman replied. Tai Ping Advertising sent out a package to women's magazines in Hong Kong. The covering letter explained that it contained 'a sample of energy water for your kind retention'. Er, no thanks. Hastings International HK is blitzing Hong Kong property buyers with information about a London development called Riviera. Slogan: 'Directly overhanging the River Thames.' Below this, it says: 'Underground parking available.' (Spotter: Fred Fredricks.) Just a thought: Eagles may soar, but weasels aren't sucked into jet engines.