Oh, Dior! It's time to keep your shirt on

IF there's one thing worse than nobody clapping, it's one person clapping - then stopping very fast because no one else is following suit.

There was a lone clapper the other day at the Hongkong launch of Christian Dior's inaugural Monsieur collection by Patrick Lavoix, recently appointed worldwide creative director for the house's menswear label.

The reason for the burst of enthusiasm was Lavoix's ''shirt-jacket'' cut waistcoat-style in front and elasticated at the back of the waist to form a blouson. Bright iridescent colours and generous sleeves ending in double cuffs completed this snappy creation.

Frankly, the rest of us should have had our wrists slapped for not joining in the applause. As current men's ready-to-wear goes, there is precious little that qualifies as different, let alone original, and this was about as adventurous as the chaps are likely to get for Spring-Summer '93.

Blame it on the recession if you like. Look at those washerwoman dresses, last seen in the Great Depression, being foisted on women, along with a tedious replay of the 60s and 70s. And look at what most menswear designers have cooked up for the season - the same better-safe-than-sorry formula.

Classics are best, they chorus. This can't be denied, especially in Hongkong where even coloured shirts raise eyebrows in certain establishments. In these penny-pinching times, it also makes sense to shun fads that barely survive a season.