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Blade fails to cut it

2-MIN READ2-MIN

Obviously, given the fact that Hollywood carries on making these films, large numbers of viewers thrill to the high-camp horror somewhat fantastically illustrated by Highlander, From Dusk 'Til Dawn and, now, Blade. I am not one of them.

I find the whole thing too trashy for words, but that appears to be the point. At least, in its defence, From Dusk 'Til Dawn played with the format of the genre. Blade, starring Wesley Snipes, is stapled to a standard three-act structure and the fact that it is an adaptation of a comic book - following in the dark vein of The Crow - does not save it from utter predictability.

Even worse, the thumping club beat - Shonen Knife is an acquired taste after all - makes this a three-pronged assault on the senses: the eyes, the ears, and any sense of plot a viewer might have had. You know early on that Blade has pitched its sails over the top and is driving full steam ahead into camp waters when a policeman points at a smouldering vampire and instructs a fireman to 'put him out!'.

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It gets worse: we have a vampire (Stephen Dorff) who wears sunblock during the day, a vampire-hunter (Snipes) who fires silver-tipped canisters of garlic at the 'suckheads' (nice new expression). We have ex-porn star Tracy Lords in a cameo and, in the Sean Connery/Highlander role, country and western singer Kris Kristofferson lurching around an inner-city garage like Quasimodo. Not only is he crippled, but he has lung cancer, a strange perm, and gaily lights up a cigarette as he fills a car with petrol. Nice-going, Kris: I hope they paid you lots.

Blade is a typical New Line film - this is a film-making empire built on the Nightmare On Elm Street franchise. I wondered why Snipes was involved until I saw his name on the credits as star, co-producer and fight co-ordinator - to my mind, that's three paycheques and a cut of the gross.

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It is impossible even to say the special effects make Blade worth checking out: when they are there, they are competent, but this obviously is not a big-budget film and SFX are only used sporadically.

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