Financial Secretary Donald Tsang Yam-kuen has always been Hong Kong's most famous film fiend - drawing on everything from Godzilla to Silence of the Lambs as inspiration for speeches. But his latest effort has left many contemplating whether Dapper Donald is considering a post-civil service acting career. His speech to the Hong Kong General Chamber of Commerce yesterday owed far more to Tom Hanks than tariff harmonisation. Mr Tsang set about proving at great length why the title character of Saving Private Ryan was a metaphor for Hong Kong's situation. We can't begin to do justice to the speech - but we learnt on the way that a) Mr Hanks was his favourite actor, and; b) Hong Kong people are all Tom Hanks. Mr Tsang also candidly admitted that drawing on the names of films to attract attention to speeches is a 'jaded tactic'. We'd have to agree! Still, it's clearly only a matter of time now before Mr Tsang becomes a leading man in action flicks. We'd suggest he commence with something along the lines of Star Wars - so he can continue his struggle against evil speculators. Alternatively, he could always star in spaghetti westerns - or maybe their Chinese cousins, rice westerns. We have been amazed by the resurrection of ex-Airport Authority corporate development director Clinton Leeks. Remember, this was the man who just a couple of months ago made the following statement: 'I saw somewhere the opening of the new airport described as a state of the art PR pratfall. If so, I am the prat.' Now, intensive lobbying is said to be going on to make him our first Commissioner for Tourism. From 'prat' to tourism saviour in a few short weeks. Remarkable what a spot of image polishing can do. Our plea yesterday for anagrams on the name of the now former Hong Kong Airport Authority chief executive Hank Townsend has brought up a swag of responses. Reader Richard Hadfield has come up with 'Won't Send Hank', 'Hand Sewn Knot', and one extremely unlikely scenario: 'Hank Sent Down'. Other readers have preferred to use the ex-airport boss' full name - Henry Townsend - as a basis for name reshuffling. With this alternative, Stuart McMillan has come up with a cracker: 'Sworn, then deny'. We're sure this is in no way a reflection of Mr Townsend's conduct at recent inquiries. Some things in this world are puzzling at best, and at times downright scary. Lai See was informed recently by several residents of a high-profile residential community that they had received information from on high that 40 per cent of the area's security staff had criminal records. Despite receiving several informal acknowledgements that this was a fact - from sources in both the community in question and in Government - we have had terrible trouble officially confirming the information. We have conservatively made between 30 and 40 calls to try to get to the bottom of the matter. But people in senior official positions around town - and even the residents' 'representatives' in the development - have gone to amazing lengths to stop this being publicised. We wonder how the residents would feel if they knew of the backgrounds of some of their protectors? We also wonder why nobody will talk about it. Let's face it: 1998 would have to be the annus horribilis for Hong Kong Air Cargo Terminals (Hactl). There were all of those tonnes of rotting meat, seafood and vegetables soon after the opening of Chek Lap Kok. That catastrophic move back to Kai Tak days after the new airport's opening. And, more recently, there have been persistent power failures after it moved back to the new airport. Is it any wonder, then, that the company is going very low key on its Christmas function this year? Its most-valued clients have been asked to enjoy Christmas cocktails in a cost-conscious environment. Where? The Hactl staff canteen. Good to see Macau's international airport keeping right up to date with its passengers' needs. A colleague passing through the facility picked up a Chinese-language newsletter from the only pile he could find awaiting arriving passengers. Its date? May/June, 1996. Clearly an example of an environmentally friendly pamphlet policy: Don't distribute a current newsletter if copies of a 2.5-year-old one are still left.