Amud-slinging match between two unsightly, naked men.' This was how a Taiwan politician described the slug-fest between Wu Den-yih and Frank Hsieh, respectively the Kuomintang (KMT) and Democratic Progressive Party (DPP) candidate for mayor of Kaohsiung.
Perhaps taking a leaf from the colourful shenanigans in Washington, both contestants - or at least their supporters - have circulated tape-recordings, videos, and other propaganda material insinuating that their opponents were guilty of misdemeanours including adultery and chumminess with the Taiwan mafia.
The popular mayor of Taipei, Chen Shui-bian, who is running for re-election, had, according to detractors, taken sex trips to Macau. He has, alas, also been faulted for 'exploiting the martyr status' of his wife. The much-revered Mrs Chen is handicapped from the waist down due to a traffic accident more than 10 years ago.
Scores of other candidates are said to have benefited from the largesse of Bamboo Gang triads, real-estate barons, or 'Chinese Communists'.
Welcome to another uniquely Taiwanese election, which never fails to entertain, if not always to churn out saintly mandarins in the Confucian mode.
After all, local politicians have the good humour to invite to their nightly 'candidates have their say' sessions not only college professors and press pundits but also talk-show hosts, pop singers, starlets and strip-tease artists.
Tomorrow, nearly 15 million Taiwanese will be eligible to cast ballots to pick the mayors of Taipei and Kaohsiung as well as the members of the two municipal councils.