Ask the doctor what's in a name

FOR reasons of delicacy (not to mention libel writs) the name of the well-known Hongkong banker in question must remain undisclosed - apart, that is, from saying he is with an Austrian bank.

Evidently, he went to Macau on a business trip and checked into a swanky hotel where the receptionist, keen to impress, was desperately trying to pronounce his name with a Germanic accent - assuming he was Austrian even though he is as English as bangersand mash.

Eventually, the girl at the reception desk settled for ''Herr Goose'', at which point the banker (English as tea and crumpets), getting into the spirit of things shot back: ''That is Herr Dr Goose, if you please.'' Without batting an eyelid, the girl behind the desk checked him in as Herr Dr Goose - and that was how everyone in the hotel called him for the duration of his stay.

Shouldn't have been a problem, except that two acquaintances of his checked into the hotel a day later and, hearing the staff address him thus, were completely flummoxed as to why he had taken on a Germanic identity for the weekend.

To their credit, assuming that their banker friend might be on a guarded mission connected with dispersing financial advice, they chose to discreetly avoid him the entire time.