Various (Universal) Football has an official soundtrack . . . and it's not that of chairs being hurled through windows or noses assaulting riot batons. Given the odd line-up of songs considered likely hits, the suits at European soccer headquarters must have come up with this cross-cultural collection to mark the on-pitch events in Belgium and the Netherlands.
In goal there's the familiar international refrain of 'campione, campione' from the uncapped E-Type, with the song, er, Campione 2000.
The defence, led by the Eurostars with Ole Ole Ole Ole, and DJ Jean, looks suspect, while the backbone of the four-track midfield is the imaginatively titled Euro Chant 2K, from Shaft.
Discounting Great Escape 2000 by the England Supporters Band (and its highly appropriate Dirty Rotten Scoundrels mix), the exotic flair comes up front from the drum-heavy Ketama and the classiest act on the field, Republica, whose rock approach puts them in the same league as Garbage.
Elsewhere the album is peppered with techno-pop you wouldn't notice if it were background music on a TV commercial, and over all it misfires like the England forward line. Its worst sin, however, is the appropriation of hymn Jerusalem. Why? The words are too long for the average terrace-dweller.