AS A COUNTRY, you know you've got an image problem when two of your three greatest modern inventions are attributed to other nations, and the third is deemed a waste of time.
Last month Britain released 'the most comprehensive review ever undertaken of how the world sees the United Kingdom', a two-year study that surveyed young people in 30 countries. Almost uniformly, creation of the World-Wide Web and Viagra were incorrectly attributed to America, and cloning was dismissed as lacking commercial application.
Now, the 'foggy island' - full of 'skinheads and stuffy traditionalists' whose lives are daily punctuated by tea-time - is pondering a marketing makeover. And no part of the world harboured a more calloused view of Britain than Asia.
'A lot of them are drunk; they like to get drunk and cause trouble,' said one Hong Konger who perhaps had recollections of expats playing Wan Chai warrior. Said a Singaporean: 'At least I'm giving the country a chance; I'm going there to have a look before I condemn it.'
The British Council, the British Government's principal agency for cultural relations overseas, surveyed thousands of educated young people, aged 24 to 35, on five key areas: society and people, creativity and innovation, higher education, business and institutions.
Of the top 10 countries with the least favourable takes on Britain, Asian nations occupied six spots, with China coming in first and Hong Kong fourth.
So patent was China's disdain for all things British that it was even addressed in the report's foreword: 'China, so resolutely unimpressed by just about everything about the UK, almost deserves to sit alone in its own highly critical category.'