IT'S ELECTION TIME. The race is on to elect the most worthy candidate to the most important position in Hong Kong. Millions are on tenterhooks with anticipation, the airwaves buzz with cerebral chatter and hundreds of column inches are filled daily with debate over who deserves the honour.
Or rather they aren't. This year's Chief Executive election is about as exciting as watching fish dry. All bets are off (not that any were on since the Jockey Club isn't even allowed to accept wagers on soccer matches, let alone elections) - incumbent Tung Chee-hwa is a shoe-in to keep his job, whether you like it or not. And many certainly don't.
Unlike five years ago, when former chief justice Sir Ti Liang Yang gave Tung a run for his money, no realistic challenger has thrown his or her hat into the ring this time around. A bid this week by activists to nominate a Yorkshire terrier as the city's top dog was disallowed by returning officers. Recently, Tung mustered an attack on Democratic Party leader Martin Lee Chu-ming for 'badmouthing' Hong Kong after racehorse trainer Brian Kan Ping-chee publicly urged Tung to toughen up and sack those who disagreed with him. But on the electoral Richter scale the spat hardly registered a blip.
Fireworks or no fireworks, citizens can be forgiven for showing little interest. Democracy Hong Kong-style means you are not entitled to vote unless you're one of the 800 chosen people on the Election Committee.
When we asked what they would do if they were Chief Executive, politicians, social workers, film-makers and socialites all weighed in with their manifestoes. And they make thought-provoking reading.
Non-politicians offered the boldest proposals, from introducing laws making Chinese mandatory on all signs, to setting up Las Vegas-style casinos, holding a gay mardi gras, cutting tax, banning farming and sacking the entire Executive Council. Others railed against intervention from Beijing and scrapping the currency peg to the US dollar.
One idea which kept cropping up was to bring in full democracy - with Legco and the Chief Executive being elected by universal suffrage. That way anyone could stand for the top job and open up debate. For the meantime, we'll have to settle for the hypothetical candidates ?