The Baby Owner's Manual: Operating Instructions, Trouble-Shooting Tips and Advice On First-Year Maintenance By Louis and Joe Borgenicht Dymocks $135 Many first-time parents lament the fact that unlike most modern gadgets, babies don't come with instructions. Well, now they do. Written by American paediatrician Louis Borgenicht and his son Joe, co-author of The Action Hero's Handbook and a father in his own right, this is a nifty step-by-step guide to baby care. Cleverly written in manual-speak and illustrated with basic diagrams (think airport lavatory signs), the baby is often termed 'the model' and its parents 'the owners'. And to reassure parents more familiar with computers than children, the first chapter likens newborns to PCs ('the baby requires a source of power to execute her many complicated tasks and functions'), video cassettes ('the baby's head will require frequent cleanings for optimum performance') and cars ('like an automobile, the baby may expel unpleasant odours into the atmosphere'). This, together with a note on the first page advising users to 'inspect their model carefully and check for all standard parts' or consult the baby's service provider (aka the paediatrician) if any of these parts are missing or inoperational, sets the tone of the book. Despite this tongue-in-cheek approach, the advice is extremely practical. The authors cover a comprehensive list of baby-care topics and common concerns, from advice on configuring the nursery and buying 'essential transportation accessories', such as car seats and strollers, to general maintenance - installing a diaper, tracking the baby's waste functions, cleaning and dressing - and safety. Particularly good is the chapter on sleep, which deals with understanding the sleep mode, activating it using the no-cry and the low-cry methods, programming a day sleeper into a night sleeper and troubleshooting other sleeping problems. Helpful tips dot the pages, as do warnings, and the handbook makes a good source of reference for clueless owners of all ages who don't want their little models malfunctioning.