The verdict is in. The Matrix Reloaded amounts to more of the same, only with flashier special effects and a duller plot. But one question remains: what are both flicks actually about?
The short answer of course is product placement. Watch the shades worn by Neo, the Messianic hero, fly off the shelves as easily as he parts the clouds.
Maybe this column should leave the explanation there and instead investigate the role of customer relationship management in Dumb and Dumberer. For the reader, getting the lowdown on what a matrix actually is could feel like discussing the meaning of life, the universe and Schrodinger's cat on the last night of a yoga weekend.
To complicate matters, the word has around a zillion conflicting meanings, ranging from the grime stuck to the clutter archaeologists dig up to (deep breath) 'an electroplated impression of a phonograph record used to make duplicate records'.
In general, a matrix is something that provides support or structure. The word comes from the Latin for 'womb', which itself stems from the Latin for 'mother', mater (itself a derivation from the Carthaginian for 'dogsbody/victim').
One man with a clue about the meaning of 'matrix' in the sense the Wachowski brothers intended is Neo's mentor, Morpheus. He defines it as 'everywhere - even now in this very room. You can see it when you look out your window. Or when you turn on your television. You can feel it when you go to work. When you go to church. When you pay your taxes. It is the world that has been pulled over your eyes to blind you from the truth.'
In other words, it is everything. Not very enlightening. But when Morpheus gets his giant brain into gear he comes much closer to cracking the riddle, defining the matrix as 'a computer-generated dream world built to keep us under control'.