Q: I HEARD that the ultimate orgasm is when both partners climax at the same time. Although we are both happy with our sexual relationship, this has never happened to my husband and I. I sometimes wonder if we are missing something. Dr Rose writes: In the late 50s many marriage manuals pushed the idea that mutual orgasm, or both partners having an orgasm at the same time, was the ultimate experience in a sexual relationship. In fact, according to surveys of sexual behaviour, mutual orgasm is not that common. Although mutual orgasm may be very pleasurable most sex therapists now advise against setting it as a goal of a sexual relationship. In fact, by focusing on mutual orgasm you may make it more difficult to reach orgasm. Remember that an important component of sexual pleasure is observing the other person achieve orgasm. Try not to think that something is missing from an otherwise satisfying sexual relationship if you fail to achieve mutual orgasm. Instead, be pleased if it happens by chance. Q: I am pregnant and living in China because my husband is posted there for work. I am planning to deliver my child in Hong Kong. My husband is concerned about air travel during late pregnancy. Is it safe, in your opinion, to fly when one is pregnant? Dr Rose writes: Yes, it is safe to travel when you are pregnant, provided you are not at high risk. However, if you have high blood pressure, pre-eclampsia, severe anaemia, diabetes, placental problems or vaginal bleeding you should ask your doctor beforebooking a flight. Most airlines allow pregnant women to travel up to about 36 weeks gestation. If you are especially large, you may need a doctor's certificate to certify that you are not in your final month. Before you make a reservation, check with individual airlines about their policies. Pregnant women should take special precautions during air travel. Ask for a seat as far away from the smoking section as possible. The relatively low oxygen tension in the cabin, combined with tobacco smoke, can interfere with the oxygen supply to your foetus. Don't forget to get up and walk around at least every hour. Prolonged sitting can cause blood pooling in the legs due to stasis. Buckle your seat belt low and tight across your lap or pelvic area. Ask the stewardess for a seat belt extension if the one in the seat is too small. Avoid alcoholic beverages and drink plenty of fluids since the cabin air is extremely dry. Consult your doctor about taking any travel sickness remedies. Q: We are moving to Lamma Island next month. I notice there are a lot more bees and insects on Lamma than on Hong Kong island. I have three children and I am worried they might get stung. If they do, how should I treat the stings and bites? Dr Rose writes: During the summer months the number of insect bites and stings increase significantly, with children being at the highest risk. While all insects have the potential to bite or sting, some are more problematic, especially if they cause an allergic reaction. Bites from ants, caterpillars, ticks, fleas and centipedes are usually mild and cause a local reaction: that is, pain, swelling, bruising, redness and burning. There may be an associated rash. For all bites, the best treatment is to wash the affected area with soap and water, check the wound for the stinger, or any remaining hair or spines, and remove them. Then apply a cold compress. If the affected area is on the hands or arms, remove any rings or watches. If there is any significant swelling, discomfort or itching, you can give oral antihistamines such as chlorpheniramine or diphendydramine and apply a mild topical steroid cream or lotion or antihistamine. In the case of bees, wasps hornets, scorpions or spiders, some individuals (about one in 200) experience an allergic reaction with symptoms such as light-headedness, nausea, muscle cramps, swelling of the eyes and lips and difficulty speaking, swallowingand breathing. This can signal a medical emergency and the affected individual will need to be taken to a medical facility as quickly as possible. Those who have a known anaphlaxis or severe allergy to bee stings and other insect bites, should carry an epinephrine injectable pen with them at all times. If you or any of your children are affected, consult your doctor about purchasing one of these. Dr Rose Ong is a certified family physician licensed in the United States. She welcomes enquiries but cannot answer them individually. Specific questions should be addressed to your own physician. Additional enquiries: Peak Corporate Health Management, 525-6600, fax 525-8100.