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Don't be caught dead in ...

Bernard Willhelm's Superbowl ensembles (above right). Ditto Sonia Rykiel's winter whites (below centre]. If you're man enough for this season's kilts, think Kurt Cobain, not Braveheart (as seen at Vivienne Westwood, below left). As for Etro's checks and Lord Of The Rings facial hair (right), just say no.

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