bodyType

customContents

entityId

entityUuid

articlePageQuery

filter

article

articleBaseAdvertisingInfoArticle

articleListArticle

articleSeoArticle

hooksArticleAcknowledgementGateOverlayArticle

hooksTrackPageViewArticle

hooksContentInterestArticle

articleLinkingDataContent

hooksAmpRedirectArticle

articleSchemaContent

liveArticle

advertZone

sentiment

contentLock

topics

types

sections

paywallTypes

createdDate

publishedDate

sponsorType

urlAlias

moreOnThisArticles

commentCount

authorLocations

authors

corrections

displaySlideShow

multimediaEmbed

printHeadline

seriesContainer

articleSpeeches

socialHeadline

headline

images

flag

firstTopic

glossary

flattenTypeIds

image

relatedLinks

relatedNewsletters

__typename

sponsor

pdfFiles

seriesReverseOrder

series

disableOffPlatformContent

published

updatedDate

summary

subHeadline

body

keywords

readingTime

customTimezone

liveContents

SCMP Reporter

Renee Chan, 14

There were four people in a plane crash: the Pope, President Bush, an old man and a young girl. There were only three parachutes. The Pope went first followed by George Bush. The old man then said to the young girl, 'I'm really old, so you take my parachute.' The girl replied, 'Don't worry there are still two parachutes. President Bush took my backpack.'

Kiran Aswani, 14

David Beckham is trapped on a galloping horse and is about to fall to his death. He's screaming: 'Help! Help! I need to get off, I'm stuck! Help!' The Toys 'R' Us manager walks out of the shop and unplugs the  ride.

Joe Slater, 14

Why is there no Mexican Olympic team? Anyone who can run, jump or swim is already in America.

Simon Thomson, 15

I probably can't use one of my many naughty jokes, so I'll go with this instead. Two cows are in a field. One cow turns to the other and says, 'Are you worried about mad cow disease?' 'No, not at all,' replies the second cow. The first cow  then asks inquisitively, 'Why not?' The second cow replies, 'I'm a helicopter.'

Alina So, 14

After one of the patients in a mental hospital saved a suicidal man by pulling him out of the bathtub, the director told him: 'Your heroic behaviour indicates that you're ready to go home. I'm only sorry that the man you saved later strangled himself.' The man replied, 'No, don't worry, I hung him up to dry.'

Garron Kertnen Chiu, 15

A man is waiting behind a blonde at a drinks machine. The blonde puts $6  in, presses 'Coke', and a can of Coke comes out. Before the man can buy his drink, the blonde puts in another $6,  presses 'Coke', and a can of Coke comes out. She does this another time and the  frustrated man asks, 'Are you done yet, lady?' The blonde replies, 'What do you mean, am I done? I'm winning!'

Paris Herbert-Taylor, 15

What's brown and sticky?  A STICK!!



Tell us a joke!