Q Should sole custody be abolished in divorce cases?
I am still reeling from a divorce that cost $7 million and encompassed custody issues involving our son. I therefore consider myself experienced enough on the rules governing custody in Hong Kong to have an informed opinion on this latest proposal by the Law Reform Commission.
In my case, and I suspect a majority of others, the concept of shared custody of a child would not work. The reason most married couples get divorced is because they cannot agree on fundamental issues. To assume that they will agree on matters concerning their offspring is unrealistic, even if the intention is to protect the child from any conflict.
In my particular case, the reasons were far more complicated than this. I am a foreigner who has lived and worked in Hong Kong for a long time. My ex-wife is a local Chinese.
Problems started to magnify after our son was born, to the extent my ex-wife abused both my son and I psychologically and physically on a regular basis. This was partially accepted by the judge, although it was very difficult to prove.
I felt compelled to take action to protect my son, who was four years old at the time, by starting divorce proceedings and applying for sole custody. This was a very painful process, but I firmly believe it was in the best interests of our son. He is now a very balanced child.
