Don't read this until you've had your breakfast.
Why? Because it's all about tongue piercing - and all the things you'd probably rather not know about it. Or perhaps I should say, all the things teenagers would rather their parents didn't know about it.
Tongue piercing is possibly the ultimate badge of the fashion victim. Anyone who likes eating, drinking, keeping their own teeth and having breath that won't knock out an army wouldn't ever get their tongue pierced.
But even though tongue studs break your teeth, make your breath smell awful and wear out your gums, they've become so popular that the wearers can't even be considered rebels any more.
So many young adults are wearing them that dental schools are researching the effects, and dental hygienists are giving courses in how to keep them clean. And there are reports of nasty complications, as well.
There was the young man whose stud ended up splitting his tongue in two parts. It might have worked for a 70s' punk band, but the boy was psychologically traumatised, according to a case report published in this month's British Dental Journal.