Some people are angered by religious cartoons. Others get into a flap over headscarves. Now, Filipinos are showing what makes them lose their cool - spoons and forks. A few weeks ago, the principal of a school in Montreal reportedly called a seven-year-old Filipino-Canadian pupil a 'pig' and 'disgusting' because he ate lunch using a spoon - rather than a knife - and fork. Traumatised, the boy became reluctant to eat at home.
It set off a flurry of indignant letters and charges of racism. The Philippine ambassador to Canada said he would investigate the matter.
Manila, which probably thinks it has seen every type of rally by now, witnessed one of the weirdest ever when angry spoon-wielding demonstrators, utensils held high, paraded before the Canadian embassy.
I should say that every Filipino uses a spoon and a fork, and for good reason - it's hard to eat lunch using a straw. All right, I'm kidding. I really have no idea why, although one possible reason is that we eat rice and many dishes cooked in soup - meals that are hard to manoeuvre with a knife.
We are not alone, either. Most Asians, when they do not use chopsticks, default to the spoon and fork combination. Centuries ago, a European explorer noted how natives here ate using porcelain plates and gold spoons. That was in 1521, when Canada was not even a concept. Apparently, though, our traditional methods are not sophisticated enough for certain Canadians. But maybe if the child had used a gold spoon, the principal would have been impressed.
While I've seen conflicts over religion and politics, this is the first time I've heard of a controversy over cutlery. It reminds me of Gulliver's Travels, where two countries fight over which end of an egg should be cracked.