bodyType

customContents

entityId

entityUuid

articlePageQuery

filter

article

articleBaseAdvertisingInfoArticle

articleListArticle

articleSeoArticle

hooksArticleAcknowledgementGateOverlayArticle

hooksTrackPageViewArticle

hooksContentInterestArticle

articleLinkingDataContent

hooksAmpRedirectArticle

articleSchemaContent

liveArticle

advertZone

sentiment

contentLock

topics

types

sections

paywallTypes

createdDate

publishedDate

urlAlias

moreOnThisArticles

sponsorType

commentCount

authorLocations

authors

corrections

displaySlideShow

multimediaEmbed

printHeadline

seriesContainer

articleSpeeches

socialHeadline

headline

images

flag

firstTopic

glossary

flattenTypeIds

image

relatedLinks

relatedNewsletters

__typename

sponsor

pdfFiles

seriesReverseOrder

series

disableOffPlatformContent

published

updatedDate

summary

subHeadline

body

keywords

readingTime

customTimezone

liveContents

Have you got a question for Jaime? E-mail her at free@scmp.com

Hi Jamie,

I'm having  problems with self-discipline. I keep trying to get myself to do things without my parents nagging me.

I constantly feel down  because I  upset my parents  by postponing things all the time.

And  I  tell lies because I don't want to do my work. I want to change but it's very difficult.  How can I build up self-discipline?

Harry

Thanks for your e-mail, Harry. Self-discipline can be hard, especially when you feel like you're being hassled by your parents.

Self-discipline is basically training yourself, by practice, to complete the tasks before you.

It's important to know that no one can ever be perfect, but you can learn to become focused and keep your mind set on the tasks you are doing.

This takes lot of practice, so don't feel disappointed if it takes a month or two to improve.

Start by knowing what you need to complete before the end of the day.

Write a list of things to be completed, then write down next to each one how long you think it will take to complete.

Sometimes, it can be really hard to stay focused for a long period of time, so  just focus on one thing for 15 to 20 minutes.

You'll be amazed how much you can complete in that time if you really focus.

Another thing I encourage you to do is motivate yourself into being disciplined with some self-affirmations.

Tell yourself when you don't feel like doing something: 'I can do this. I can complete the work that I need to get done today.'

Start being your own life coach.

Let me know if you want some more ideas.

Dear Jaime,

I don't know how to stop my bad thoughts. I  always feel  low and I don't like myself at all. Everyone else is so much better than me.

I can't remember the last time I really believed the compliments  my friends give me. I don't want to feel this way any more. What can I do?

Kat

Dear Kat,

It's great that you don't want to feel this way anymore. It sounds like you need a boost in your self-esteem.

Self-esteem is the most important value to develop in your life because it's inside of you and no one can take it way from you unless you let them.

One of the first things you can do is to stop comparing yourself with others.

There are millions of people living in Hong Kong, but no one's the same. There will never be another you on this planet. Everyone is unique.

The first thing I want you to do is to write down all the areas of your life in which you compare yourself to others - your intelligence, talents, looks and so on.

Then think about how you can  stop comparing yourself to others in those areas.

Write down some ideas on how you can appreciate yourself for being you.

Another thing you can do is  say positive things about yourself.

Instead of saying 'I don't like myself', say  'I like myself for the following reasons'.

If you don't start to accept compliments soon, your friends and family will stop giving them to you.

They will  feel like you  don't care about what they have to say.

Accept compliments by simply saying 'thank you'.



Free to be me