Ever been caught in a public place with a full bladder and no restrooms in sight? On July 1, which is Canada's birthday and a national holiday, at least three young men found themselves in such a predicament in downtown Ottawa. They sought relief in a darkened corner against a wall of granite. Unfortunately for them, the wall was the base of Canada's National War Memorial.
A retired military man caught the inebriated young fellows on camera, unzipped and in full flow, and passed the images on to the local daily newspaper, which featured them on the front page. Howls of outrage ensued and the police were ordered to pursue the villains.
Now, I'm not about to suggest that anybody should make a habit of disrespecting a national monument. But the way people are carrying on, you'd think those boys had topped up the Queen's teacup. It was late at night, the streets were filled with revellers and there are no public toilets anywhere in downtown Ottawa.
As for the monument, it lies at the heart of Confederation Square, and if that suggests to you a bucolic public place with fountains and outdoor cafes, then you'd be seriously misled. The square is actually a triangle-shaped island of mostly concrete surrounded by three to six lanes and a river of traffic. If the lads chose to urinate there, it might have been a case of expose yourself to the crowds, wet your pants or water the memorial.
While many good citizens were calling for a lynching, veteran newspaper columnist Roy MacGregor pointed out that everybody has a right to be stupid at some time. A great many of any person's stupid acts occur in their youth. And then again, not all stupidity is the province of the apparent miscreants.
Take my dear nephew, who is a waiter, an art student and pretty handy with a set of bagpipes. Some months ago he was weaving his way home from a party in Edmonton, Alberta, in the early hours of the morning and took a short cut through an alley. Nature called. As he stood there discreetly relieving himself in a darkened corner, a police car rolled up. It turns out that he was breaking a city law. The officer handed him a ticket for C$50 ($340). I don't know who should feel more foolish: my nephew or the officer who felt obliged to ticket him.
