After my twins were born in 2004, I worried about their poor health. I had a job as an art gallery administrator, so after their situation improved they were looked after by their grandmother. But I missed them a lot. My relationship with my husband was on the rocks. We argued over everything. He was unemployed and I was the sole breadwinner. When I returned home from a hard day's work, my eldest daughter, then seven, never listened to me but instead argued, making life miserable for me. I easily flared up. I felt utterly helpless and even contemplated suicide several times. During those months, I often hit my daughter. I knew it was not the right thing to do, but I couldn't control myself. I deeply regretted spanking her. I remember once beating her with a hanger, bruising her. I was really sorry for this. I discussed the matter with a social worker at Against Child Abuse. I understood that beating my daughter was wrong. But when she misbehaved, I couldn't help beating her again. The struggle wore me out. I was in acute pain. Now when I recall the nightmare, I cannot even remember exactly why I was mad at her. I shouldn't expect a seven-year-old to understand my feelings. There could have been so many better ways to ease the situation. I later joined the Batterers' Intervention Therapeutic Group organised by Against Child Abuse. This was the turning point; I was advised to use constructive methods to teach my daughter. I should appreciate and encourage her rather than scold and beat her. I changed mentally. When she argues with me, I appreciate how she feels comfortable to express her feelings to me. The 10-session workshop guided us to practise the things we learnt. I have never beaten my daughter since then. There are still times when I get angry with her. I would then walk away, drink some water, and calm myself down, before talking with her again. The effect of the changes was obvious. People can tell that my daughter is now much happier and has more confidence in herself. The mother's real name has been changed to protect her children's identities