THE news spread like wildfire. Could it really be true that one of the five lost soldiers in the Malaysian jungle was filming their ordeal? When it was all over, would there really be a record of events on film? When Major Ronald Foster emerged from the Malaysian Sea King helicopter, tired, starving, but still with camcorder pressed firmly to his eye, TV editors began licking their lips with anticipation.
Imagine. A story which had made the front pages from Hong Kong to the United Kingdom, now detailed as it actually happened. The realisation of suddenly being lost, the desperation of unsuccessful rescue attempts, then the hunger, the thoughts of possibledeath as each in turn made their wills, and finally, the exhilaration, discovery, and rescue.
However, someone we know who has viewed the two-hour tape did not once use the word ''interesting''.
Take away the shots of the rescue, admittedly quite gripping stuff - all 71/2 minutes of it - and you're left with cloud-covered shots of what is apparently the now infamous Low's Gully, a few impromptu botany lessons and about one hour 50 minutes of Major Foster speaking to the camera about . . . house extensions.
The rockfalls, flash floods and interaction between the group all took place when the camera wasn't rolling, understandably since survival tends to come first in such circumstances, we're told.
''It's perhaps something Major Foster could show to a gathering of the Territorial Army Veterans' Association,'' our wag surmised.
