Conjugal rites

Before the end of the Qing dynasty, in 1911, the six marriage rites were strictly adhered to in China. Tradition dictated the man's family would make the initial approach to the woman - never the other way around. A go-between, who could be a family member, friend or professional, would then take a token present to the would-be bride's family with the man's birth details on a piece of red paper. This was the first rite, na cai, when the present was accepted to indicate the proposal was being considered. The second rite, wen ming, occurred when the woman's family gave her birth data to the go-between to be presented to the man's family.

The third rite, na ji, which means 'acceptance of the propitious', occurred after the astrological data of the future bride and groom had been analysed and considered compatible by a professional. This constituted a betrothal that should not be broken except by mutual agreement. The fourth rite, na zheng, or 'acceptance of evidence', was when there was an exchange of presents between both parties. The fifth rite, qing qi, 'asking the date', was usually carried out by the man's family, who consulted a professional for an auspicious time and date for the wedding. When the date and time were accepted by the woman's family, the sixth and final rite, ying qing, or 'receiving the bride', took place.