SECRET report on LRT crash calls for safety moves, screamed our headline on Tuesday, as our intrepid transport correspondent blew the lid off a Government investigation into this month's fatal train-crash on the Light Transit Railway. The Government had recommended safety improvements, but Transport Branch had refused to release any of the report's findings or recommendations. 'Nyeh-nyeh, nyeh nyeh-nyeh. You got it wro-ong,' responded a Transport branch press-officer later that morning. A 'secret report', he claimed, was not one where the contents of the report were kept hidden from the press, public or anyone else. Instead, a report was only secret when none of these people knew the report had even been done. By the way, the report we headlined was still secret, even by the Transport Branch definition. The LRT said it knew nothing about it. But From The Corridors is now looking forward to reading the full Daya Bay contingency plan, a complete verbatim transcript of the Joint Liaison Group talks, the files kept on us by the Special Branch and Xinhua and the reports of Deng Xiaoping's medical team. YOU think that's all a bit optimistic? Not at all. Hong Kong reporters covering last week's Sino-British stand-off in Beijing were rather taken aback when the JLG's whole 12-point agenda was broadcast on Chinese Central Television (CCTV). Not very good television, but interesting diplomacy. JLG business is supposed to be secret - sorry, confidential. Used to Britain being damned to perpetual hell-fire by Chinese officials every time it lets a detail slip out, journalists expected a similar counter-blast from the UK delegation. They were even more surprised at the following day's press conference when British team leader Hugh Davies not only seemed unaware of this Chinese breach of the Joint Declaration, but failed to respond with any dastardly revelations of his own. But he was obviously mulling the matter over. Finally after stonewalling reporters' questions for several minutes in the time-honoured JLG tradition, he allowed himself the flicker of a smile. When the next question came, he had an answer ready. 'Why don't you watch CCTV tonight and find out?' he suggested helpfully. BACK in Hong Kong this week, Mr Davies was still obviously nursing the wounds of what he called his 'interesting expedition'. Opening an exhibition at the Mandarin by New Territories artist Geoffrey Key, he was quick to remind guests that last Monday was not only the 10th anniversary of the initialing of the Joint Declaration, but also the 201 anniversary of Lord Macartney's appearance before the then Chinese Emperor Qian Long. The British envoy was treated as a tribute-bearer and sent packing when he refused to kowtow. The exhibition was called 'The Key approach to Hong Kong'. Said a wistful Mr Davies: 'I wish I knew the key to approaching Hong Kong.' ALSO returning to Hong Kong soon, after a rather longer absence and even more interesting times, is none other than the Prince of Wales. He is to appear, fully clothed, at the Convention Centre on November 7 to inaugurate the World Congress on Urban Growth and the Environment. Recognised internationally as a follow-up to the 1992 Earth Summit in Brazil, the conference is expected to attract at least 250 delegates from China, as well as another 500 or so from the rest of the world. But right now, the keenest interest centres on whether US Vice President Al Gore will also attend. He has expressed an interest. But it seems his environment has been significantly polluted by the fall-out from Haiti. THE Legislative Council is so appalled by the logo its secretariat designed for it earlier this year that it has opened a public competition for a replacement. Critics say, unkindly, in our view, that it looks more like an artist's impression of a prison than a pillar of democratic government. We think it looks like the grille of a roadside drain. The competition opens today and lasts until November 15. But being strapped for cash, the Council's not been able to match the $15,000 prize money which the Arts Development Council's offering for its new design. First prize from Legco is glory. A worried phone-call reached us from the bowels of the building yesterday. It seems there's a real concern no one's going to enter a drawing at all. 'No money,' wailed the voice, 'no logo.'