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Fionnuala McHugh

CHRISTINE LOH KUNG-WAI, Legislative Councillor Q: How much is a large carton of milk? A: I don't drink milk. I'm a vegetarian. But I buy bananas. Does that count? Q: What is a tierce? A: Is that a racing thing? When you get three horses coming in? Q: Who is Faye Wong? A: I don't know.

Q: How much is a one-way MTR ticket from Tsuen Wan to Admiralty? A: $7? I buy a stored-value.

Q: What is a CFC? A: Isn't that the harmful product that comes out of air-cons and refrigerators.

Q: Who is Dr Martens and why is he famous? A: Was he the chap who was on your front page a few weeks back? He's not the vice something or other of Belgium, is he? Q: What is the cost of a stamp for a standard local letter? A: $1.30. Yes. For a local letter. $1.30. (A few minutes later) No, the price of a stamp is $1.

Q: How much is the lower-deck Star Ferry fare? A: The lower deck? I haven't taken the lower. The upper deck is . . . $1. I do take it, you know.

Q: What is the cost of the South China Morning Post? A: $5.

Q: Who is Warren Christopher? A: US Secretary of State.

Q: How much is a Big Mac? A: I don't know. I'm a vegetarian. So I haven't been in a McDonald's for years. I can tell you how much a lunchbox is though.

Q: Name any three local first division football teams.

A: Uh, South China . . . That's hard. I don't know.

Q: Who is Qian Qichen? A: I know that of course. He's the Foreign Minister of China.

Q: When is the Lunar New Year 1995? A: The last week of January. I don't know the exact dates.

Q: Why should we care about Hoi Ha Wan? A: Hoi Ha Wan? Are we talking about a place? Are we talking about a beach or harbour? Is that where the dolphins are in trouble? By the airport? Q: What do you do if a black rainstorm warning signal goes up? A: Frankly, you should stay at home. But I'm usually at work.

Q: Who is Angel Mou Pui-peng? A: I don't know.

Q: What is a sim kar? A: I don't know.

Q: What is Blue Ice? A: A beer.

Q: What is the EPD? SAR? PWC? PAA? A: Environmental Protection Department, Special Administrative Region, Preliminary Working Committee, Provisional Airport Authority.

REMARK: Perhaps Christine Loh should try reading the newspapers she writes for. For an environmental campaigner, she could do much better.

  HAIDER BARMA, Secretary for Transport Q: How much is a large carton of milk? A: Uh, I don't know. Ask my wife. She always says I should go out to the supermarket. Because when I complain about the bill, she says: 'You're living in the dark ages.' Q: What is a tierce? A: A tierce? A tierce. Isn't it one of those racing tickets? Where you bet who comes in first, second and third.

Q: Who is Faye Wong? A: Faye Wong? I know Fei Peng. I know Fei Fei. But I don't know Faye Wong.

Q: How much is a one-way MTR ticket from Tsuen Wan to Admiralty? A: $9.

Q: What is a CFC? A: It is chloro fluorine carbon - something like that. It has to do with air-conditioners.

Q: Who is Dr Martens and why is he famous? A: Doctor Martens? Oh, Doc Martens! He's those shoes. All the school kids wear them. I don't wear them. But my 14-year-old does.

Q: What is the cost of a stamp for a standard local letter? A: $1.

Q: How much is the lower-deck Star Ferry fare? A: $1.

Q: What is the cost of the South China Morning Post? A: $6; I read it every day.

Q: Who is Warren Christopher? A: He's the US Secretary of whatever it is called.

Q: How much is a Big Mac? A: $6.50? It's not one of my favourite snacks. I prefer Oliver's sandwiches.

Q: Name three local football teams? A: South China, Eastern, Rangers.

Q: Who is Qian Qichen? A: Oh come on: he's China's Foreign Minister.

Q: When is the Lunar New Year 1995? A: End of January.

Q: Why should we care about Hoi Ha Wan? A: Marine life.

Q: What should you do if a black rainstorm warning signal goes up? A: As a member of the public, I stay at home.

Q: Who is Angel Mou Pui-peng? A: Isn't she that girl who was convicted of drug trafficking in Singapore? I read about it in the Post.

Q: What is a sim kar? A: It doesn't ring a bell.

Q: What is Blue Ice? A: It's a new beer. Ice is drugs. But Blue Ice is beer.

Q: What is the EPD? SAR? PWC? PAA? A: Environmental Protection Department, Special Administrative Region, Preliminary Working Committee, Provisional Airport Authority. (He gets every one right.) REMARK: Good general knowledge - a bit off-track on public transport fares though.

  EMILY LAU WAI-HING, Legislative Councillor Q: How much is a large carton of milk? A: Do you mean the weight? Oh, the price - I don't know.

Q: What is a tierce? A: I don't know.

Q: Who is Faye Wong? A: She's a pop star.

Q: How much is a one-way MTR ticket from Tsuen Wan to Admiralty? A: I take it all the time but I use a Common Stored Value ticket so I'm not sure of the exact cost - maybe $9.50.

Q: What is a CFC? A: It's to do with the environment. It's a very long word. I know because I'm on the environmental panel.

Q: Who is Dr Martens and why is he famous? A: I don't know.

Q: What is the cost of a stamp for a standard local letter? A: $1.20.

Q: How much is the lower deck Star Ferry fare? A: $1.

Q: What is the cost of the South China Morning Post? A: $5.

Q: Who is Warren Christopher? A: He's the American Secretary of State.

Q: How much is a Big Mac? A: I just had one today but I don't remember how much it cost by itself - $12 maybe.

Q: Name any three local first division football teams.

A: (She named three in Chinese rapidly).

Q: Who is Qian Qichen? A: He's the Chinese Foreign Minister.

Q: When is the Lunar New Year 1995? A: I don't know. How many more of these questions are there? I'm quite busy.

Q: Why should we care about Hoi Ha Wan? A: I don't know so I'm not worried.

Q: What should you do if a black rainstorm warning signal goes up? A: You should stay at home.

Q: Who is Angel Mou Pui-peng? A: I don't know.

Q: What is a sim kar? A: It's those cards which teenagers collect.

Q: What is Blue Ice? A: It's a kind of soft drug.

Q: What is the EPD? SAR? PWC? PAA? A: The Environmental Protection Department, the Special Administrative Region, Preliminary Working Committee and the Provisional Airport Authority.

Remarks: Treated questionnaire with a combination of magnificent disdain and tetchiness. Good on popular culture but should know better about environmental issues.

  ELSIE TU, Legislative Councillor Q: How much is a large carton of milk? A: I have no idea, I hardly have time to exist so I don't do household chores.

Q: What is a tierce? A: Something to do with three . . . Oh, it's racing is it? I've never been to a racecourse.

Q: Who is Faye Wong? A: I'm afraid I don't know - some kind of actress? Q: How much is a one-way MTR ticket from Tsuen Wan to Admiralty? A: I never travel on the MTR.

Q: What is a CFC? A: These initials get me stumped . . . do you mean some kind of organisation? Q: Who is Dr Martens and why is he famous? A: I've heard his name but I can't remember in what connection. Is he American? Q: What is the cost of a stamp for a standard local letter? A: $1.

Q: How much is the lower-deck Star Ferry fare? A: I never use it and it's free for me anyway.

Q: What is the cost of the South China Morning Post? A: $5.

Q: Who is Warren Christopher? A: He's the American Foreign Secretary.

Q: How much is a Big Mac? A: I don't buy Big Macs.

Q: Name any three local first division football teams.

A: South China is the only one I know, I'm afraid.

Q: Who is Qian Qichen? A: He's the Chinese Foreign Minister. You see, I'm better on politics.

Q: When is the Lunar New Year 1995? A: January 31.

Q: Why should we care about Hoi Ha Wan? A: I suppose it's something to do with nuclear power.

Q: What should you do if a black rainstorm warning signal goes up? A: You should stay put.

Q: Who is Angel Mou Pui-peng? A: Sorry, I have no idea.

Q: What is a sim kar? A: I've seen that in advertisements but I don't know what it is.

Q: What is Blue Ice? A: Is it a drug? Q: What is the EPD? SAR? PWC? PAA? A: That's the Environmental Protection Department, the Special Administrative Region, Preparatory (sic) Working Committee and the Provisional Airport Authority. It's always politics that I know about but I'm lost in common knowledge questions. Sorry I'm such a dud.

REMARKS: Apologetic but obliging. Not terribly good on general information on Hong Kong and would obviously have preferred a more legislature-related list of questions.

HAMISH McLEOD, Financial Secretary (TO COME)   LIU YIU-CHU, lawyer, National People's Congress delegate and Hong Kong Affairs Adviser Q: How much is a large carton of milk? A: How much is it? You mean on the stockmarket? Oh, the supermarket - I never think about buying it.

Q: What is a tierce? A: I don't know what this is. [Clue: it's to do with racing] Oh, I don't think about that either. We had a little share in a horse once and then it died.

Q: Who is Faye Wong? A: I can't answer these questions. My mind is not on the right track.

Q: How much is a one-way MTR ticket from Tsuen Wan to Admiralty? A: There isn't a station there. Oh, is there? I can't answer that.

Q: What is a CFC? (Question deferred) Q: Who is Dr Martens and why is he famous? (Question deferred) Q: What is the cost of a stamp for a standard local letter? A: (Laughs) I don't really know. I throw it out for my secretary to post.

Q: How much is the lower-deck Star Ferry fare? (Question deferred) Q: What is the cost of the South China Morning Post? (Question deferred) Q: Who is Warren Christopher? A: This is like a quiz game in the middle of my office hours. I do very serious professional work for my clients. I think this game is off. I can't participate in this. My mind is not on this game. You must excuse me.

REMARKS: Well . . . much laughter initially, which soon dwindled into squeaky rage. Could do much, much, much better.

  PAUL SELWAY-SWIFT, executive director of the Hongkong and Shanghai Banking Corporation and chairman of the Hong Kong Association of Banks Q: How much is a large carton of milk? A: It's my wife's job to know that.

Q: What is a tierce? A: It's getting the first three horses in a race. I should know that - I'm a steward at the Jockey Club.

Q: Who is Faye Wong? A: I don't know.

Q: How much is a one-way MTR ticket from Tsuen Wan to Admiralty? A: I use a Common Stored Value ticket so I don't know exactly.

Q: What is a CFC? A: It's a chloride fluorocarbon.

Q: Who is Dr Martens and why is he famous? A: He's that chap who designed those shoes which look like army boots and which my daughter wears all the time.

Q: What is the cost of a stamp for a standard local letter? A: Oh, my secretary deals with that.

Q: How much is the lower-deck Star Ferry fare? A: I'm guessing this one. I know it's $1.50 on the top deck so let's say 50 cents.

Q: What is the cost of the South China Morning Post? A: I have it delivered and pay every month so I'm not sure - $5 maybe? Q: Who is Warren Christopher? A: US Secretary for Foreign Affairs. I haven't got that quite right, have I? But you know what I mean.

Q: How much is a Big Mac? A: I'd guess $15.

Q: Name three local first division football teams.

A: Instant Dict, Sing Tao and South China.

Q: Who is Qian Qichen? A: He's the Foreign Minister of China.

Q: When is the Lunar New Year 1995? A: Late January, I think. Let me look it up (sounds of desk calendar being rustled down the telephone). It's January 31.

Q: Why should we care about Hoi Ha Wan? A: I don't know. We're all going to look like fools in this Sunday's paper, aren't we? Q: What should you do if a black rainstorm warning signal goes up? A: I'd start to make sure that the bank is closed and that the staff all get home safely.

Q: Who is Angel Mou Pui-peng? A: Hmm, must be another Canto-pop star.

Q: What is a sim kar? A: I've heard of it but I don't know.

Q: What is Blue Ice? A: It's a beer.

Q: What is the EPD? SAR? PWC? PAA? A: The Environmental Protection Department, the Special Administrative Region, the Preparatory (sic) Working Committee and the Provisional Airport Authority.

REMARKS: Pretty well-informed. Didn't quite grasp the point of this feature (we knew when Lunar New Year was but it was nice of him to look it up for us). And let's hope no one from Hongkong Bank gets caught in a landslide during the next black rainstorm warning.

  SELINA CHOW LIANG SHUK-YEE, Legislative Councillor Q: How much is a large carton of milk? A: I don't know.

Q: What is a tierce? A: You mean racing? Three wins in three races.

Q: Who is Faye Wong? A: Yes. I have daughters. She's a pop star.

Q: How much is a one-way MTR ticket from Tsuen Wan to Admiralty? A: $13? Q: What is a CFC? A: CFC? No.

Q: Who is Dr Martens and why is he famous? A: Not the shoe man? Q: What is the cost of a stamp for a standard local letter? A: $1.

Q: How much is the lower-deck Star Ferry fare? A: $1.20.

Q: What is the cost of the South China Morning Post? A: Do you mean the paper? How much is it? (panicked rustling in the background). I can't answer.

Q: Who is Warren Christopher? A: Of course I know. The Foreign Secretary of the United States.

Q: How much is a Big Mac? A: Oh God! No idea now. I do buy it very often for my children. But we always buy it in one package. And we always get the Quarter Pounder, not the Big Mac.

Q: Name any three local first division football teams.

A: Oh God! South China. Uh, I know that star team with Allan Tam on it. My knowledge of soccer is not that good.

Q: Who is Qian Qichen? A: The Foreign Minister of China, the Vice-Premier.

Q: When is the Lunar New Year 1995? A: January 31.

Q: Why should we care about Hoi Ha Wan? A: That's the harbour. The pollution in the harbour. It's in a sad state.

Q: What should you do if a black rainstorm warning signal goes up? A: You have to make up your mind whether your children should go to school and whether or not you should go to work.

Q: Who is Angel Mou Pui-peng? A: I don't know.

Q: What is a sim kar? A: I don't know.

Q: What is Blue Ice? A: I don't know.

Q: What is the EPD? SAR? PWC? PAA? A: Environmental Protection Department, Special Administrative Region, Preliminary Working Committee, Provisional Airport Authority.

REMARKS: Selina Chow, we feel compelled to note, had just returned from London and was suffering from jet lag. Good marks for effort but not for general knowledge.

  JIMMY MCGREGOR, MEMBER OF THE LEGISLATIVE COUNCIL Q: How much is a large carton of milk? A: $7 Q: What is a tierce? A: I don't bet but I know that it's a betting system for the first three correct placings in a race.

Q: Who is Faye Wong? A: I don't know.

Q: How much is a one-way MTR ticket from Tsuen Wan to Admiralty? A: It must be around $7.

Q: What is a CFC? A: It's a chloro-fluorocarbon.

Q: Who or what is Dr Martens and why is he famous? A: I don't know.

Q: What is the cost of a stamp for a standard local letter? A: It depends on weight but I'd say it's $1.20.

Q: How much is the lower deck Star Ferry fare? A: At the moment? I don't take the lower deck - I'd say about 50 cents.

Q: What is the cost of a copy of the South China Morning Post? A: $5.

Q: Who is Warren Christopher? A: He's the American Secretary of State.

Q: How much is a Big Mac? A: $7.

Q: Name any three local first division football teams.

A: Instant-Dict, Sing Tao and South China.

Q: Who is Qian Qichen? A: He's the Chinese Foreign Minister.

Q: When is the first day of the next Lunar New Year? A: End of January.

Q: Why should we care about Hoi Ha Wan? A: I think because it's one of the bays which is under considerable danger from pollution.

Q: What should you do if a black rainstorm warning signal goes up? A: Pray.

Q: Who is Angel Mou Pui-peng? A: I've seen her name in the press - is she a singer? (on being told the answer) I ought to know that. I've written to the Singapore president pleading her case. It's a very sad story.

Q: What is a sim kar? A: Hmm . . . sim is probably short for 'simulated' and kar - is it an electric car? Q: What is Blue Ice? A: Is it a dance band? Oh, I see. I don't drink, I only know two beers - Carlsberg and San Miguel. Now that you mention it, I think I remember the ad with the ice but I bet a lot of people don't know what it is.

Q: What is the EPD? SAR? PWC? PAA? A: The Environmental Protection Department, the Special Administrative Region, the Preliminary Working Committee and um . . . oh yes, the Provisional Airport Authority.

REMARKS: Good-tempered and interested in the answers. Knew about Hoi Ha Wan but it's surprising that Angel Mou's name didn't ring a louder bell. Not too bad on popular culture - even though he prefaced this questionnaire with the modest observation that he is a 'half-baked' politican.



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