Culture Club | Hongkongers don't need an adultery website to get their kicks

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Published: 6:54pm, 28 Aug 2013Updated: 11:54am, 27 Nov 2013

The Hong Kong launch of American adultery website Ashley Madison might have drawn attention from the English-speaking community and concern from moralists, but all these debates about whether the arrival of the site will tear families apart seem pointless – not because Hong Kong men don’t cheat, but because there are far too many better options out there.

“If the website targets at the affluent Hong Kong Chinese market, it’s not going to work,” said one successful ad man in his early 40s the other night. He has been married for 10 years with two beautiful children aged six and three.

“No muss no fuss is our motto. An affair simply causes too much trouble. Any emotional baggage that comes with an affair is too dangerous. What if she goes crazy and wants to chop me into pieces? I’d rather pay for sex, and it’s readily available,” he said, casually swirling his glass of Pinot Noir which I found a little too bitter.

“For convenience there are services available in town, or you can go on sex141.com, or pick up a girl at a bar or club - though that doesn't always work. Otherwise you can go to Macau, Dongguan or even Southeast Asia. You pay and play and you won’t bring home any trouble.”

“Hey but if you really have money, why not take a model or some actress as a mistress? Why do you waste time browsing the web like those losers on Golden Forum?” laughed an annoying trust fund "baby" in his 30s living off his family’s fortune. “I love those long legs.”

I couldn’t bear listening to this conversation any longer. It was a little offensive, but then, I thought, staring intently at my glass of wine, it simply echoed what Ashley Madison founder and chief executive Noel Biderman has said in an earlier SCMP interview, that cheating was more or less part of the DNA shared by human beings, with or without this new adultery website.

The reality is, concubinage was not banned in Hong Kong until 1971. Many tycoons today still don’t mind parading their multiple trophy girlfriends or “wives” as if they were ancient Chinese emperors. And infidelities are one revolving theme in local popular culture – not only do few get to do it with the internet, but most are comical and non-judgemental.