To make a toddler listen, a hug is more powerful than words

Getting toddlers to listen is far from easy. When I talk to parents, one of the most frequently asked questions is how to teach their children to listen. A toddler may not listen as well as a primary school child, but they can be good listeners. They just need guidance appropriate for their age.

I believe it is never too early to begin teaching a child to listen. It helps them learn effectively, develop self-control, make friends and get a better head start in life.

Oregon State University's two-decade study on attention span and persistence levels is worth reading. It found that toddlers who were better at concentrating, taking directions and persisting with a game even after encountering difficulties had a 50 per cent greater chance of ending up with a university degree. The study tracked 430 children from preschool to 21.

It showed that the most relevant predictor of later academic success was not the early introduction of mathematics or second languages, but whether they were taught social skills such as listening, paying attention, and how to follow directions at their young age. It suggests that the earlier the parents intervened, the more likely a child would succeed academically.

It is not unusual to find young children ignoring parents or teachers while they are developing their identities. It is because they have realised their needs do not always match others. "Not listening" is just a way of communicating: "I don't agree with you. I am what I am."

The good thing is at least your child is not throwing tantrums like other toddlers.