Opinion | The importance of teaching children good social skills
How can I help my young son develop better social skills? He is often awkward in company and can appear to be rude. I don't want him to develop bad habits.
Children are extremely adaptable. Some will observe their environment and work out the best behaviour, and others will try different approaches and adapt based on the reaction they receive. The problem is that sometimes first impressions count, so rather than having to deal with the consequences of poor first impressions, it is easier to teach children how to make a positive impact from the very first meeting.
Older children can respond to discussions about the effects of their behaviour and can work with parents to develop new habits, but small children usually can't evaluate the feedback they get from others and will need to be guided.
Manners may be a slightly old-fashioned topic these days, but there is no question that children with good manners gain positive reactions from the people they meet. Initial greetings are very important. Your son can develop the habit of making good eye contact when he first meets people. If he is very shy, you may want to gradually build up to him saying hello rather than put extra pressure on him until he is more adept at interacting with people. He can always start with a smile.
As the saying goes, "you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar". Conveying friendliness and warmth is important and will make people more likely to encourage him to speak.
Nobody likes to feel like they're being ignored, and indicating that you are acknowledging the other person is vital.
Without expecting your son to behave like a character from Downton Abbey, he can still use good manners to create a positive impression. You can gently encourage him to say please and thank you, small social graces that make a big difference.