Why shared dinners are essential for a healthy and happy family – and the ways to get your kids to buy into it
- There are some common themes that help to create a good mealtime routine, like not commenting on what your children do and do not eat
- Others include having no mobile phones at the table and being a good storyteller
My children were born 19 months apart. For about a year after my second arrived, I’m not sure anyone ate dinner, let alone together. A lot of cereal was consumed at strange hours, but nothing that resembled a family meal.
There’s a lot of research about the benefits of family dinners that seems to be linked to everything in kids: better grades, better health, better vocabulary, and a lower risk of smoking, drinking and using drugs. Although it’s not a magic bullet, gathering around a meal matters.
It mattered to me, as it was one of the deep, consistent rituals of my own childhood. Yet the survival habits I developed during those early months and years of parenting – often handing my toddler son an iPad before I nursed my daughter, eating with my husband after we put the kids to bed, in front of the TV because we were too tired to make conversation – started to become the norm.
Getting back from that to what we have now – an early dinner where at least one parent is present and electronic devices are off – with our five- and six-year-old most nights was a raggedy business, and remains a work in progress. There’s lots of information about what to cook for a family dinner but much less about that final, more ephemeral ingredient: how to make it happen.
For us, storytelling, silliness, gratitude and a monumental (if sometimes failed) effort not to nag our kids to eat their food have powered a family dinner renaissance. And although every family is different, here are common themes that contribute to success.