If a friendship or an interest is dead, give it up because it’ll do you good, author says
- When should you give up a friendship or hobby? How alive does it make you feel? An expert explains why letting something go can be healthy
Do you sometimes feel forced to carry on with something you no longer enjoy, such as learning to play the piano or maintaining – out of a sense of obligation – an old friendship that you now find draining?
Abandoning something is often regarded as a failure rather than an opportunity to put your time and energy to better use, says British psychoanalyst Adam Phillips, author of the new book On Giving Up.
But if we give up doing things that weigh us down or make us unhappy, we clear the decks for other, more fulfilling things, he says. So quitting can be liberating – and even healthy.
“We’re brought up to believe that persistence and determination are good things,” he said, promoting his new book in an interview with the US-based cable news network CNN.
“Well, of course they are good things. If you want to learn to play the piano, you cannot just give up when it’s difficult. But, on the other hand, do you actually want to learn to play the piano?