I was in Beijing in search of an ass sandwich. I read about “lurou huashao,” a wild donkey meat sandwich, in the in-flight magazine and thought it was the grossest-sounding dish. I had yet to try it.
Even in a country known for its unapologetic consumption of anything on four legs, it was difficult to find ass meat.
The concierge at the hotel laughed when she figured out what I was asking for. She turned her colleague, who just stood there speechless.
My father had better luck tracking down the delicacy. He called his friend, “The Professor” and the next thing I knew we were in a taxi heading south out of Beijing.
Dad, who likes to make friends with strangers, was immediately chummy with the driver. With the three words of Putonghua my father speaks (three words more than me), the driver knew exactly what we were after. After 40 minutes in traffic, we arrived at Qin’s Aromatic Spicy Crab Restaurant, a large shop lining a busy boulevard. The awning outside had illustrations of dancing crabs on fire. Inside, I found out why. This place is known for its firepot crabs and cheap beers by the litre. A large photo of young Chairman Mao posing outside the restaurant reigned over the entrance.
Making friends with the driver was a good strategy. He acted as our translator. Remember, though, that he's a professional taxi driver. After a great deal of confusion, I ended up looking at a plate of what could be donkey meat. The driver pointed to his rear then at the tray of meat. The owner says the butt is tough and does not have a desirable taste. Clearly there's been a miscommunication.